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HisServant

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HisServant last won the day on June 7

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About HisServant

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    Ladla||Ladli
  • Birthday 08/22/1997

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  1. ਅਖੀ ਬਾਝਹੁ ਵੇਖਣਾ ਵਿਣੁ ਕੰਨਾ ਸੁਨਣਾ ॥ To see without eyes; to hear without ears; I think this is the corresponding shabad
  2. Blessings to everyone. I am writing this today in a bit of shock and disbelieve but at the same time a lot of peace and satisfaction. These past few weeks/months had been a bit of a rough sail for me. I had lost a lot of faith in spiritual teachers. I had been hearing and seeing a lot of drama that didn't sit well with me. So part of me fell off the boat a bit. I was still listening to shabad and looking at parkash. But I wasn't putting effort in to try and move further. I was sitting still. Something even worse happened in my personal life a few days ago. A very subtle but very strong attachment got pulled away from me. An attachment I didn't realize was there but was really consuming my mind. I'm not going to lie, I lost my stability. I was upset. Angry. Lost. Confused. And it had been a very long time since I experienced a pain that made me upset like that. I began isolating myself and really letting my mind be consumed by shabad and parkash because I knew that was the only way out of the trap I had fallen into. I had to work extremely hard. But just now I was laying on the floor looking at parkash internally. I opened my eyes to look at the parkash that exists externally. Mind was clear, no thoughts. And I had a realization. "This parkash exists both outside and inside... Are my physical eyes the one seeing them?..... And then all of a sudden I felt this third area of space. A place that wasn't the internal body, nor the external world. It was this place in the middle. I think it was beyond the mind or some extension of the mind. And sitting in that space there was just parkash. It was like looking at a new world with a new set of eyes. The best way I can describe this is by using the term "non-physical" eyes. It's as if the parkash outside and inside had become one. I cannot describe the amount of peace and contentment the mind and body feels sitting in that area. I don't know if it's correct for me to stay in that space. But I just wanted to write this out with the hopes that maybe someone knows what this is.
  3. One day someone throws a stone at you and hits you with the stone. You ask yourself, “who am I angry with?” You are quick to respond, “I am angry at that person” However, it was the stone that hit you… not the person. Why aren’t you angry at the stone? You think, “I’m not angry with the stone because the stone had no intention to hit me. The stone is an inanimate object that was thrown by a person. So I am angry at that person”. Using that logic, you shouldn’t be angry at the person. You should be angry at their pain. … Because the person is just like the stone. Helplessly thrown by their pain.
  4. I'm looking for a job in Downtown Toronto this summer. My resume is pretty thick and I have a really wide range of skills and experiences. it's my last term of University and I'm about to graduate.
  5. I've been spending a lot of time recently observing how people react to conflict and other situations of tension. And I'm starting to see how carrying a certain perspective can either make or break your spirituality. Whether this perspective taking is developed through bhagti or whether you need to develop this perspective to do bhagti is beyond me (like what came first, the chicken or the egg?). But I've summarized it into a few different categories. Disclaimer: this is not a complete list and is solely based on where my current understanding of the world sits. I'm just sharing what my current perspective on human behaviour is. 1. Complete duality - During this stage, a seeker has absolutely zero perspective taking ability. Does not understand that the other person has distinct thoughts and feelings. The focus is solely on the actions of the other individual. Children often express this at the earliest stage of their development. As for adults, they may have developed and have a higher understanding, but the veil of ego is so deep that they do not understand the views of the other. During this phase, a person is susceptible to the most amount of conflict and/or hurt feelings. I feel like this is where people often sit when they start fights, lash out, throw chairs and get malicious... or are in a lot of emotional pain and grief by the actions of others. "I am completely separate from this person. This other person is angry. This person yells at me and makes me feel sad. This is a bad individual... etc". 2. Partial understanding - At this stage, the seeker understands that others have their own thoughts and feelings. Other people act according to their own thoughts and feelings. But the seeker still may not realize that those thoughts and feelings may be fuelled by an underlying set of desires or goals. This seems to often lead to people holding grudges, not communicating, pushing people they don't like away but the emotional pain from the actions of others is reduced. ie "This person is mad whenever I do not take off my shoes when I enter the house. These actions make them angry. And then they yell at me". 3. The beginning of perspective taking - At this stage, the seeker starts to understand that others have goals and desires that differ from them. People act according to those goals and desires. At this stage, a seeker would recognize that other people are angry for a specific reason. And they may work on avoiding the things that make that person feel a certain way. ie "This individual wants to keep their floor clean because their desire is to have a clean house. Therefore, if someone dirties their house, they get angry. I should take off my shoes whenever I enter their house so the floor does not get dirty". But the seeker may still react negatively if their is confrontation for a mistake on their behalf. ie If the seeker accidentally walks into the house with their shoes on, instead of apologizing, they may still work to protect their own ego and possibly still lash out in a negative manner". 4. A deeper sense of perspective taking - At this point the seeker begins to understand that other people's thoughts, goals and desires are influenced by a variety of factors. This may include cultural, societal and other norms. The seeker understand that people are heavily influenced by their upbringing and the seeker begins to put themself in the shoes of the other. And realize if they had been in that persons shoes, they may feel the same way. And this is where I see empathy *begins* to develop. And there is remorse for certain actions taken on behalf of the seeker. ie "If I also had the desire to keep my house clean and someone dirtied it, I would also feel angry." And instead of lashing out, there is remorse and a seeker would rather apologize for something accidental, instead of protecting their own ego. 5. Complete perspective taking - By complete, I don't mean this is the final point. I think the understanding of differing perspectives is infinite. But I believe this stage is satisfactory enough to understand where others come from in their actions, reactions and feelings. At this point a seeker understands that the factors which influence a persons thoughts, goal and desires goes beyond cultural and social norms. There are also past experiences, traumas, neglect, differing stages of maturity, and possibly an infinite amount of other factors influencing the other persons mentality. Some of these factors may be known and easily understandable, but others may be a lot harder to pinpoint and may not be observable at a surface level. ie "This person gets angry when their house is dirtied. If I accidentally dirty their house, I should clean up myself so I can respect their desire to keep their house clean." But also at this point the seeker may also be able to understand behaviours that are not normal. For example in the case where someone has OCD or is anti-social. Instead of being weirded out, they may be able to understand that maybe this person suffers from trauma or neglect. And their thoughts and feelings over certain situations are beyond their control. I see this as especially important in intimate relationships because you really get to know another person. If a partner has certain behaviours or reactions that are seen as very abnormal. The seeker would understand that these may be a result of issues from early childhood. 6. "There is no difference between you and I" - I know this may be a big jump. But I see this as a higher level of understanding where the seeker realizes that every person is physically just flesh and bones. If the seeker had the same life experiences, culture, and even past life karams as the other person... there is almost a complete certainty that they would react in the same was as the other person. There is a lot of freedom when the mind sits with this mentality. 7. Nothing exists outside of God - At this point, it's no longer a level of educational understanding. But spiritual awakening and inner realization. Where the seeker see's Waheguru's jot within every person. And see's the world as Waheguru's doing. All the plays of karma are Wahegurus doing. Again, this is more of a spiritual experience rather than a state of intellectual knowledge. I know the examples that I provides are pretty basic but I think it could easily be applied to other, more complex situations. ie a cult leader. - This person may be lonely, neglected as a child and be seeking attention. - They want to act as a guiding figure for other people but may completely misunderstand what other peoples wants and needs are. This list is infinite. But again, this is just my understanding at this point. I know it will get deeper and more complex as there is more spiritual growth.
  6. I pretty much never intervene in conflict but I think it’s necessary right now This portion of the site is dedicated to sharing experiences. Simple. No arguments, no treguni posts. Nothing. If you guys want to discuss something, send each other a personal message. That’s what a lot of us do. We talk directly with each other in private conversations. I would recommend doing the same, especially if it’s a personal issue. People who don’t believe in sharing their spiritual experiences, also usually believe in not reading about them either. People who don’t share, typically feel susceptible to their ego feeding off of the compliments. People who don’t read, don’t want their mind tricking them during their own meditation. I understand where some of you come from. That’s why if you share, make sure you remember it’s waheguru within you experiencing waheguru. And nothing more. And if you read experiences, make sure you do your bhagti in gurmat with Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji as your reference. Sharing will help you verify the validity. Sharing is what helped me progress. @Sat1176kept me accountable and @Lucky gave me guidance. We moved together as a family and all made progress. We all came to this site as beginners with little to no experience. We did not argue, fight or compete against each other. We cared and lifted each other with compassion. We changed each others lives for the better because we shared openly, kept each other accountable, shared our knowledge and made sure each and every one of us was doing well and on track. It was our love for one another that kept our bhagti strong. It’s hard to believe this family was formed over 6 years ago. Time really flies. That being said, I want this argument to end here. If you need to say something to one another, send a direct message. But I’m hoping the posts after this post will solely be about experiences and guidance rather than small talk and arguments. I want you guys to treat each other with love and respect. You are a sangat parivaar. Your bhagti will thank you later.
  7. A new realization emerged today -> The higher self is neither day nor night The higher self is neither left nor right... nor behind nor in front The higher self is neither man nor woman The higher self is neither human nor animal The higher self is neither cold nor hot The higher self is neither sound nor silence Shabad is heard within the mind, but who is the one perceiving shabad (anhad naad sounds)? Who is the one creating shabad? If the higher self were silence, who is the one who perceives the silence? Who is the one who creates the silence -------->>>>>>> If we are God, and God is us.... how can silence be God? We must be that thing that perceives both the silence and the noise God is right here, right now. The divine energy is manifest all around.
  8. @Sat1176 @Lucky @BhagatSingh I remember years ago (and even months ago) I used to complain to you guys about how getting to dhoor and blasting the mind out of the body was such a difficulty. But I can successfully say that it's almost as if it's a walk in the park now. Did about 5-10 mins of chanting simran with a friend the other day (in a noisy public place) and the mind was ready for blast off. I still get stuck in that middle point where it feels like the minds about to launch (but never does). But even getting to this point never felt possible. I'm just working on cutting down the amount of time it takes. There was even a day where it was almost immediate. But I think it takes roughly 5 mins on average (down from 2-4 hours when I was stuck in my bubble). Btw: this was some solid advice which I can finally follow now. Almost 4 years later. But one thing to note: I'm starting to realize, these blasts may not be a journey outside of the body... perhaps they're a journey inward?
  9. It's a technique called advaita vedanta. I aim to stay with my own "awareness". When I started years ago, I would ask myself a series of questions: "who am I" "Am I this body?.... If I lost my arm, am I still me?.... If I'm still me, how does this body define who I am?.... Am I these thoughts?.... These thoughts come and go and are eventually forgotten... how could I be these thoughts?" I would go as deep as I could go. And eventually I'd get to a point where there would be just pure awareness, thoughtless and just observing any sensory information that came in, no judgement or interpretation. Current day, I typically don't need to start with those questions. I can jump straight into the awareness and stay with it day and night. But this has taken years to develop. I do the same with shabad and parkash as well. I observe the experiences that arise and it helps me merge into them. I get rid of all attachments to theories and techniques by forcing the mind to stay unbiased and non-judgemental.
  10. Thank you @Ragmaala. Applications are going well. Just playing the waiting game to see what happens. In the meantime, I have launched a charity project to help people within the south asian community. So that's the seva for now. One thing that really hit me during that major experience, was to take care of people who are suffering from mental health illnesses, such as depression, anxiety and anything else that leads to mental suffering. So there's been a big drive to help out people who are in these types of situations. Much of the people I'm working with are youth. I've noticed our people do have a lot of bad habits and traumas that have been passed down from generation to generation. And they project those traumas onto their kids who later carry the same issues as their parents when they grow older. Not everyone wants to do bhagti/meditation, but I've just been trying to help people as best as I can using other methods. It's taught me a lot and really opened my eyes to how much suffering there is in this world (Nanak dukhia sabh sansar). Also gives a boost to your own bhagti when you hold out a loving and compassionate hand to someone who needs.
  11. lol I was gone for a while eh? I'm not a doctor yet. I'm still applying to med school and just waiting to see what happens. There were times where I went through a lot of worry about my career but now I've been able to sit with the internal realization that waheguru is the one in control. Whether the med school acceptance comes or not is on God. In one moment, beggars become kings and the next, kings become beggars. I've always been a very paranoid and anxious person. But it's been so relieving being able to remain laid back and focus on one day at a time. Shabad - sound of god's voice. It's an internal sound that's heard once you're at a certain point in your progress. Parkash - is somewhat/sort of like a light. I'm not going to get into any further details because I don't think these things should be described publicly. It's better to experience them, and then have them confirmed by someone who's decently far into their spiritual journey. I don't do much chanting anymore. I do sometimes, usually in sangat. But most of the time I can just tune into shabad and close my eyes to look at parkash. And then just let the mind melt into them and go from there. There's a technique called rom rom Simran that I do use a lot of the time to give myself a bit of a booster.
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