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Husband Wife Jokes - I Love These


das

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ON PREGNANCY

 

My husband and I had been trying to have a third child for a while. Unfortunately, the day I was to take a home pregnancy test, he was called out of town on business. I had told our young daughters about the test, and they were excited.

We decided if it was positive, we would buy a baby outfit to surprise their father when he got home.

The three of us stood in the bathroom eagerly waiting for the telltale line to appear.

When it did not, my thoughtful seven-year-old gave me a hug.

"It's okay, Mom," she said. "The next time Daddy goes out of town, you can try and get pregnant again."

😅😂😂😂😂😂

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  • 1 year later...
Guest Get a life
On 2/21/2014 at 4:45 AM, Sat1176 said:

Stop laughing!!! We are not allowed to have offensive jokes on this forum. These jokes are degrading to women! Didn't you know you are making generalising statements that all women are a pain and all married men are dukhi. These jokes were probably made up by a group of gay, sexist, men who had issues with women. They should not be put up on a forum. Stop laughing at yourself otherwise you will be called a fool amongst other names. Furthermore your family will be personally ridiculed. You have been warned!

 

:angry: :angry: :) :) :):D :D

 

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Even after being a woman, I don't mind being called a weaker sex, rather I accept that YES woman are weak, We are not that strong physically and don't find it an issue to repress my ego either. 

I am happy being a woman, because being a woman makes it easy for me to Surrender, to be kind and subtle. To accept myself as a 'suhagan' of my 'kant' - Parmeshwar. 

If we ponder upon the concepts of Gurbani, we notice that in our bani all human beings are considered as wives and Lord as husband so technically speaking SGGS ji is also a female Guru. 

I am happy being 'weak' if the men around me treats me nicely, and respects me more.

You see - being a daughter I was more pampered than my brother, My brother took special care for my security when in crowd. My husband takes more responsibilities of the outside world than me, considering me tender and I love being the one who's more subtle, , more tender, I feel ' precious' to them. Big deal if I am not physically strong, I respect their manliness and accept them being 'superior 'in facing - the world' for me and giving me their 'shade. When I can easily relax and feel ' secure' in their presence. 

I am not a 'house - sitting' ( homemaker though,), I work and am easily capable of earning my own living plus supporting my kids but I love the way my husband plans our finances and respect his intelligence on worldly matters. 

I am proud that God has imparted me a capability of bearing children and  bringing them in this world, I am more blessed. More patient, sensitive and caring. 

Don't you " men " out there ❤loves your daughters more- so why wouldn't my Guru Sahib?? I am 100 percent sure HE DOES

 

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Guest guest das
On 1/8/2020 at 5:56 PM, Mooorakh said:

Even after being a woman, I don't mind being called a weaker sex, rather I accept that YES woman are weak, We are not that strong physically and don't find it an issue to repress my ego either. 

I am happy being a woman, because being a woman makes it easy for me to Surrender, to be kind and subtle. To accept myself as a 'suhagan' of my 'kant' - Parmeshwar. 

If we ponder upon the concepts of Gurbani, we notice that in our bani all human beings are considered as wives and Lord as husband so technically speaking SGGS ji is also a female Guru. 

I am happy being 'weak' if the men around me treats me nicely, and respects me more.

You see - being a daughter I was more pampered than my brother, My brother took special care for my security when in crowd. My husband takes more responsibilities of the

On 1/8/2020 at 5:56 PM, Mooorakh said:

Even after being a woman, I don't mind being called a weaker sex, rather I accept that YES woman are weak, We are not that strong physically and don't find it an issue to repress my ego either. 

I am happy being a woman, because being a woman makes it easy for me to Surrender, to be kind and subtle. To accept myself as a 'suhagan' of my 'kant' - Parmeshwar. 

If we ponder upon the concepts of Gurbani, we notice that in our bani all human beings are considered as wives and Lord as husband so technically speaking SGGS ji is also a female Guru. 

I am happy being 'weak' if the men around me treats me nicely, and respects me more.

You see - being a daughter I was more pampered than my brother, My brother took special care for my security when in crowd. My husband takes more responsibilities of the outside world than me, considering me tender and I love being the one who's more subtle, , more tender, I feel ' precious' to them. Big deal if I am not physically strong, I respect their manliness and accept them being 'superior 'in facing - the world' for me and giving me their 'shade. When I can easily relax and feel ' secure' in their presence. 

I am not a 'house - sitting' ( homemaker though,), I work and am easily capable of earning my own living plus supporting my kids but I love the way my husband plans our finances and respect his intelligence on worldly matters. 

I am proud that God has imparted me a capability of bearing children and  bringing them in this world, I am more blessed. More patient, sensitive and caring. 

Don't you " men " out there ❤loves your daughters more- so why wouldn't my Guru Sahib?? I am 100 percent sure HE DOES

 

 

The thread is about the difficulties and headaches wives give to their husbands, not females with roles as mother, sister, or friend which is a very different thing .

Thank god, that you are a woman and do  not have to go through the headaches given by wives usually

guest das

 

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On 1/10/2020 at 10:00 PM, Guest guest das said:

 

Lol! Yeah Thank you Babaji

And dasji I pity u. .. But rather I should pity ur wife instead cos she's not as lucky, she's got a husband who doesn't respect her for all she does for him and find her wishes a headache huh? 

I enjoyed the jokes though and forwarded too... 

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  • 1 year later...

After being married for twenty years a husband was looking in the mirror and said the following to his wife:

 

Husband: Honey, I look in the mirror and all I see is a fat, ugly, old man. I need you to give me a compliment.

Wife: Well alright then, your eyesight's damn near perfect. 

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