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Nirbhau Nirvair


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Sat Naam

First, thanks for your help, I found the sikhs of France on FB and they replied to me.

I also found some french writings on internet, abour Sri Granth Sahib, so I started my studies.

And i will never study as an intellectual, just with my mental. I will always related the words to the experiences, believe me !

So, actually, I need to come back about the post called "Yhe unknown bridge"

I wrote a first post, and have been asked to share more. I did. Since then, the silence seems the answer to it. That is very hard for me and I observe myself going through my own Nirbhau and Nirvair.

If I talked here, about my truth, it is only because I am motivated by "Akaal Moorat". And the Sri Granth Sahib says that this state, Akaal Moorat, can be reached only by the passage that leads us beyond nirvhau and nirvair.

Is there another way then going through my fear and anger to get to Akaal Moorat ?

I don't think so. How can we be led beyond something we would ignore, we would deny ? How to be led beyond something that doesn't exist ?

What makes something real ? To acknowledge it.

That is why I talk about it, even if it is horrible, unpleasant, disturbing. I acknowledge that happened to me, and my whole family still deny it. I talk about it, and people turn their head away from this truth. I feel like if I had aids.

If I decided to talk about it here, it is because I felt that sikhs can stand this truth. It was my intuition.

I trusted my intuition and wrote. And my fear is real, and anger can still come up within me, because of fear.

I finally wrote : it is very demanding to me to tell this truth here, to people I don't know. And if it works out, if then nobody reject me, if people talk to me in return, and reach me, help me, rather than turn their head in the other side, if this time people open up to me, rather than ignore me, so I will probably heal.

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sorry, wrong manipulation ... my post was not finished !

I understand that it is also demanding to read this truth, to listen to it and to say something in return.

What to say ?

What would be my feeling and attitude if I was told that kind of truth ?

These last days, since the post of "unknown bridge", I am thinking, meditating, and also shaken by emotions. Fear again, which becomes anger sometimes. But then I tried to change my position, to be "you", the one who are told this.

Nirvair started to be less powerful ...

But nirvhau is still harassing me.

I blamed myself for telling the truth here. I blamed you all to be so silent in return.

But I trusted, and my faith leads me. I feel very down, weak and have physical pains now, but faith leads me. "Continue. Try again, again and again. Nothing to loose anymore. Your ego is lost, anyway !" says a voice into my head ...

I came on the forum again, and didn't find any other reply. "This is to improve your faith", I thought.

So, I decided to start my studies about sikhism, and now I know why I am here. My intuition about sikhs is right. I read this about Nirvhau and Nirvair, about sikhs and the Mul Mantra :

"Where fear and anger are, the word of the Guru is not there. Where the word of the Guru is, fear and anger can't grow up. Because of the secret of Mul Mantra, sikhs kept the light within them, despite the tortures and horrors they witnessed. And they also saw the light within the creation. Their challenge has been unconditional love instead the fear and the revenge.

(Sorry for the translation, it may not be that good, but I read it in french)

So yes, I am at the right place, and I knock the door again.

I am aware that "incest" is something that carries fear, anger and shame in its wake.

I am aware that people would prefer another topic, more abstract, less personal.

But it is such a good topic to improve our faith, isn't it ?

a personal and concrete topic that give us the opportunity to practice the teachings of Sri Granth Sahib , and can lead us to be a human, to know the goal of life.

A personal and concrete topic that can lead me to healing, with your help.

"In a fool world, that went through many words, pictures, communications, all together, and competitions, the Mul Mantra give us a strong identity. He roots us in a reality so powerful, so deep, that our lives become victorious, full of joy, of love and compassion, even in the most difficult moments."



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