Jump to content

**Bride shd be younger than the Groom...WHY???**


Nectar

Do u think its ok for the girl to be elder to the guy if yes then how many years??  

4 members have voted

  1. 1.

    • yes
      4
    • no
      0


Recommended Posts

I have seen in Punjab ke hunna that while marrying the girl should be younger in age than the boy WHY?? I know , one rishta was not accepted cos the girl was 2 years elder....But she wasn't buddi...???

:shock: :shock:

Whats the reason why younger women are still preferred??I mean younger than the guy.....??

I heard my Naniji ...she said ke hunna people used to women 20 yrs in olden times :shock: :shock: OMG thats sooo bad....

I guess this practise is prevalent amongst some Muslim countries like sucha huge age difference...BUT WHY YOUNGER WOMAN??

Link to comment
Share on other sites

personally, to me, it doesn't matter if she is older but as long as it's like by a couple of years but i do believe that it's a mentality issue where people stereoptype it as a younger girl will be more likely to obey etc.............. :roll:

If you two get along, then go 4 it............

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The answer is BABIES!!!

Seriously I think that is the reason. You see men can make babies whenever, but when it comes to women, they're on a short time table.

I mean isn't it something like after the age 35 the chances of a miscarriage increase greatly....

So yeah, men need to use the baby factories while they are still open for business...cause you ain't gonna get no babies after quitin' time!

That is my theory on this topic.. :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The answer is BABIES!!!

Seriously I think that is the reason. You see men can make babies whenever, but when it comes to women, they're on a short time table.

I mean isn't it something like after the age 35 the chances of a miscarriage increase greatly....

So yeah, men need to use the baby factories while they are still open for business...cause you ain't gonna get no babies after quitin' time!

That is my theory on this topic.. :D

I know , one rishta was not accepted cos the girl was 2 years elder....But she wasn't buddi...???

IN this case the girl was abt 26 and guy was 24.......She was way younger than 35 hunna....stupid reason...i feel

Link to comment
Share on other sites

whats wrong with love stories

we should not denie ourselves of these great emotions

yes i know the greatest love is that 4 your guru but marry sum1 u love is better than arranged marriage

being in love is something special dont waste this life you have by denieing yourself from it

there is nothing wrong with loving a fellow human being its fantastic

im not on about lustful lov even thugh it may play a smaLL part

love is in the air everywhere i look around

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It shouldnt matter what age the gyal is long as she chungi and gonna respect her in-laws, age is not afactor. Most ppl dont even know there real age let alone there date of birth in india its all a estimate. Like when my uncle was born my bibi was like he was born on that very hot summer when sooo and sooo died. So people need to relax on that vibe about age.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

whats wrong with love stories

we should not denie ourselves of these great emotions

yes i know the greatest love is that 4 your guru but marry sum1 u love is better than arranged marriage

being in love is something special dont waste this life you have by denieing yourself from it

there is nothing wrong with loving a fellow human being its fantastic

im not on about lustful lov even thugh it may play a smaLL part

love is in the air everywhere i look around

What if it doesnt work out?????Plus Its all about beliefs.....I feel in investing my sacred emotions on somebody who is gonna be there for life not like aaj aah teh kal oh....So for me its love after marriage :mrgreen:

love is a panga as far as I have seen my frens....its more of peer pressure and this idiotic media and raging hormones...nothing else

Link to comment
Share on other sites

its the whole Male Dominate Soceity. Marrying someone who is Younger is giving the 'impression' of being dominent because the Groom is older and Wiser.

Just like a Young boy/girl will respect anyone who is older....the same principle is applied to the Marriage, If the Bride is older, then the ego of the male dominate soceity gets a blow, that the bride is more wiser and dominent.

That cannot be...altho this practice was not an issue in the days of our parents being married, but it is becoming an issue and the Main reason is that Women in the Male Dominated Soceity are becoming equal and they voice their opinion and concerns more effectivly and with Authoirty.

So More Power to you ladies.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree with you Pheena, but I also disagree with the way many women rage over equality. I think we should all have the basic equalities such as civil liberties as we are all people...but it should be realized that men and women are different!!!

Its idiotic how some women complain that a man is in the military why can't I join? You wanna join? Then live up to the same standards if you are all about equality. A soldier needs to carry his heavy gear and be mobile. We should not compromise the quality of our army just cause some woman wants to join (if she can do all a man can, then join).

Basically my point is that while I understand that this practice is becoming an issue due to equality women are fighting for, I think women are taking the equality thing too far. Recognize that we are different..ex: men are typically better capable physically than women. I agree that women needs fair rights, but I think we should try to complement one another kinda like yin & yang, and not equal...

Sorry about the tangent, I don't mean to offend anyone especially the women on this board.

PS...no one agrees with the babies theory? :?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

.....I feel in investing my sacred emotions on somebody who is gonna be there for life not like aaj aah teh kal oh....So for me its love after marriage :mrgreen:

love is a panga as far as I have seen my frens

then another question arises.......what if u have invested 5-6 yrs in a relationship and kids are now part of the factor............and now ur spouse says we're getting divorced.......don't u feel cheated?

Now I know most ppl are gonna say........"that never happens".....*ahem ahem*.......yeah right.......... :roll: I have seen with my own eyes where a couple have tried the arranged way and been together for at least 5+ years but then somehow end up getting divorced...........

In my opinion, if it's a love marriage then go 4 it, try it out and u'll know it works out if it's true love.....not the let's get married cuz i liked u in the beginning and not anymore kinda deal.........

cuz if it's true love then it's like the saying.......don't marry the person you can live with, marry the person you can't live without

ultimately it all comes down to do whatever works for you as long sa it makes you :D

Gurfateh..........

Link to comment
Share on other sites

then another question arises.......what if u have invested 5-6 yrs in a relationship and kids are now part of the factor............and now ur spouse says we're getting divorced.......don't u feel cheated?

Now I know most ppl are gonna say........"that never happens".....*ahem ahem*.......yeah right.......... :roll: I have seen with my own eyes where a couple have tried the arranged way and been together for at least 5+ years but then somehow end up getting divorced...........

In my opinion, if it's a love marriage then go 4 it, try it out and u'll know it works out if it's true love.....not the let's get married cuz i liked u in the beginning and not anymore kinda deal.........

cuz if it's true love then it's like the saying.......don't marry the person you can live with, marry the person you can't live without

ultimately it all comes down to do whatever works for you as long sa it makes you :D

Gurfateh..........

A Real Singh who understands the meaning of Anand Karaj would never ever divorce unless the woman is cheating or something..He wud never divorce for some stupid reason like normally people do ..out of lack of tolerance..or some other woman...divorce is a western concept....there nothing like that in Sikhi....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A Real Singh who understands the meaning of Anand Karaj would never ever divorce unless the woman is cheating or something..He wud never divorce for some stupid reason like normally people do ..out of lack of tolerance..or some other woman...divorce is a western concept....there nothing like that in Sikhi....

easier said than done.......... 8) but I understand what you're saying that a person(let alone a REAL SINGH/SINGHNI) who understands anand karaj would not go that route but it's not always the case......

but as I have mentioned before ji that if a rishtaa makes a person happy then so be it and if a love marriage works then do that........

whatever works as long as its true and real otherwise it would like the rest of the culture where couples are together for the sake of it (kids, parents........) to please others instead of their ownselves......

Bhul Chuk Maaf Karna.........

Gurfateh Ji..........

Link to comment
Share on other sites

wow... so many interesting things to discuss.

let's start with love is a panga versus love is everywhere!

i honestly don't think it matters if you're gettin an arranged marriage or not. it's not what led you guys to the wedding day. it's what happens after the wedding day that counts. and i'm not talkin dirty here, so stop thinkin dirty, u sickos.

my meaning is that it takes a lot of work to make a marriage work. you need to make an effort to make the relationship work. getting an arranged marriage doesn't automatically mean that you're safe from a divorce. neither does having a love marriage. and it's definitely not a guarantee that marrying a REAL SINGH/NEE is gonna protect you from a divorce either.

there are many REAL SINGH/NEES out there who don't stay in the relationship simply cuz it's not working for them. for whatever reason, it they're not happy, what point is there in staying in the marriage. and by this, i don't mean that they break up after one fight. i mean if they've given it everything they've got, they've been together through a lot and NOTHING is working.

why would you want your kids to grow up in a negative atmosphere? children do learn what they see from their parents. and if they see that their parents hate each other and can't stand each other, then they're only gonna learn things from that.

anywho.

Monk, ur baby theory sounds... questionable. it was true in the past when girls would get married off as soon as they started gettin their periods. but tha's not what happens these days. well, at least not as far as i know...

Pheena, i understand what you're saying, and so far that sounds like the only plausible answer. whether it's true or not, we'll have to see...

googly, there's no real way to answer this question because there are exceptions made to this rule all the time.

but at the same time, it's easy to see how there wouldn't be as much of an issue for a man to marry a girl 10 years younger than him but would raise a controversy for the entire comunity if a woman decided to marry a guy 10 years younger than her. (i'm not sayin a 20-something marrying an 11 year old here...)

Monk, what the heck are you talkin about? women can and do join the army and do exactly what men do.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Monk, what the heck are you talkin about? women can and do join the army and do exactly what men do.

Um...I don't think you got my point...I'm not discriminating against women..I just feel that men and women should complement each other instead of striving for the I'm equal to you thing....because we are not equal...this doesn't mean men are better or vice versa, just we are two parts of the one whole...Am I making myself clear on this?

On the army thing, I said that not because I don't want women in the army, I said if they can perform to the same ability as a man then they can join....I mean strictly the fighting ranks, nothing keeping women from being the strategists...I hope this clears my view up. I'm not some sexist pig....

Basically my point is that while I understand that this practice is becoming an issue due to equality women are fighting for, I think women are taking the equality thing too far. Recognize that we are different..ex: men are typically better capable physically than women. I agree that women needs fair rights, but I think we should try to complement one another kinda like yin & yang, and not equal...
Link to comment
Share on other sites

i'm sorry if it seems like i called u a sexist pig. but i for one know that ur not being sexist. as for u bein a pig... well, tha's something only and God would know.

it's because we complement each other that we're equals Monk.

but at the same time, because one sex can't exactly do the same things that the other sex does, it doesn't undermine the overall strength of one sex.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i'm sorry if it seems like i called u a sexist pig. but i for one know that ur not being sexist. as for u bein a pig... well, tha's something only and God would know.

it's because we complement each other that we're equals Monk.

but at the same time, because one sex can't exactly do the same things that the other sex does, it doesn't undermine the overall strength of one sex.

lol...I think we are still misunderstanding each other.

i'm sorry if it seems like i called u a sexist pig. but i for one know that ur not being sexist. as for u bein a pig... well, tha's something only and God would know..

first....ouch... :cry:

it's because we complement each other that we're equals Monk.

I completely agree. I felt I said this in my posts, but to clarify I do feel that we should try to complement each other, and NOT say I'm equal to you in everyway...cause there are differences between the sexes. However, that doesn't hinder our equality, if you get what i'm saying.

but at the same time, because one sex can't exactly do the same things that the other sex does, it doesn't undermine the overall strength of one sex

Of course not, I don't think it undermines the overall strength of one sex. I was merely using the physical strength example, as well an example to show the sexes are different. I did not mean it to convey that men are in superior in anyway.

To sum up, I merely meant to say that men and women should be more inclined to act as complements to each other, instead of trying to be equal in everyway..should be kinda like yin and yang, that represent the two complementary elements of the universe in Chinese religions

this is mainly to those extreme feminists. cause if you wanna be equal grow a penis.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

lol... ur makin me laugh Monk. aren't u supposed to be celibate and absolutely non-sexual in any way whatsoever if you're a monk? lol...

i agree with what you're sayin, though. there are some radical feminists out there who're gonna try to match up the sexes in absolutely every single way possible, which isn't necessarily possible.

physical strength isn't the only point of difference between men and women. methods of communication, logical thinking skills are among some of the differences that are part of men and women.

what i think is wrong is for one group of people to say "men are better" or "women are better". it's simply not true and not possible.

are we understanding each other better now?

and dun worry, i know ur not a pig. i was just teasin u...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...