JOYce

Try reading these Toungue Twisters occassionally...your talking skills, clarity will increase....

Peter bought a butter, The butter Peter bought was bitter.

So Peter bought a better butter, To make the bitter butter better.

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.

Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers?

If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,

where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?

Betty Botter had some butter, "But," she said, "this butter's bitter.

If I bake this bitter butter, it would make my batter bitter.

But a bit of better butter-that would make my batter better."

So she bought a bit of butter, better than her bitter butter,

And she baked it in her batter, and the batter was not bitter.

So 'twas better Betty Botter bought a bit of better butter.

Six thick thistle sticks. Six thick thistles stick.

A big black bug bit a big black bear, made the big black bear bleed blood.

The sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick.

Pope Sixtus VI's six texts.

She sells sea shells by the seashore. The shells she sells are surely seashells.

So if she sells shells on the seashore, I'm sure she sells seashore shells.

Surely Sylvia swims!" shrieked Sammy, surprised.

Someone should show Sylvia some strokes so she shall not sink."

Shy Shelly says she shall sew sheets. Sam's shop stocks short spotted socks.

A flea and a fly flew up in a flue. Said the flea, "Let's fly!"

Said the fly, "Let's flee!" So they flew through a flaw in the flue.

Which wristwatches are Swiss wristwatches?

Lesser leather never weathered wetter weather better.

A bitter biting bittern Bit a better brother bittern,

And the bitter better bittern Bit the bitter biter back.

And the bitter bittern, bitten, By the better bitten bittern, Said: "I'm a bitter biter bit, a lack!"

Mr. See owned a saw. And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw.

Now See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw before Soar saw See,

Which made Soar sore.

Had Soar seen See's saw before See sawed Soar's seesaw,

See's saw would not have sawed Soar's seesaw.

So See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw.

But it was sad to see Soar so sore

Just because See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw!

The boot black bought the black boot back.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

He would chuck, he would, as much as he could, and chuck as much wood as a

woodchuck would if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

We surely shall see the sun shine soon.

Which witch wished which wicked wish?

MICHAL inJOY(ce) 6

Michael is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say.

When someone would ask him how he was doing, would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!"

He was a natural motivator.

If an employee was having a bad day, Michael was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation. Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Michael and asked him, "I don't get it! You can't be a positive person all of the time.

How do you do it?"

Michael replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today.

You can choose to be in a good mood or ... you can choose to be in a bad mood. I choose to be in a good mood.

Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or...I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or... I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.

"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested.

"Yes, it is," Michael, said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice.

You choose how you react to situations.

You choose how people affect your mood.

You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood.

The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life."

I reflected on what Michael said. Soon thereafter, I left the Tower

Industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him

when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.

Several years l ater, I heard that Michael was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower.

After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Michael was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back.

I saw Michael about six months after the accident.When I asked him how he was, he replied. "If I were any better, I'd be twins. Wanna see my scars?"

I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place.

"The first thing that went through my mind was the well being of my soon to be born daughter," Michael replied. "Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or... I could

choose to die. I chose to live."

"Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked. Michael continued, "...the paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into

the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared.

In their eyes, I read, "he's a dead man. I knew I needed to take action."

"What did you do?" I asked.

"Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me," said Michael.

"She asked if I was allergic to anything.

"Yes, I replied." The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply.

I took a deep breath and yelled, "Gravity." Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to

live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead."

Michael lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully.

Attitude, after all, is everything.

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.

Each day has enough trouble of its own." After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

You have two choices now:

1. Ignore this.

2. Send it to the people you care about.

You know the choice I made

Enjoy each day, each breath and mostly---each and every friend

Salutations Friends,

I dont have any knowledge on the said issue. I never experience God with my own senses. And as per logical science We have to believe only on the informaton we got through our senses. And in my small period of life i have been told that GOD is a supreme power i:e: He can do everything. I never experience such wonderful miracle of doing everything in my life. But I experience such supreme power in a single thing which saw me miracles and that is nothing my dear fellow(s) but nature mother. So i believe GOD as nothing but nature. It might possible that my view r not liked by some of U. But it is my way of thinking.

Thanx

Your date describes you! Its not a myth its Science & have its own logics & concepts....

> Dear friends there are an Italian horoscope given

> below. You can find a lot about you by just

> searching your own identity in Italian way.

> What you have to do is to find your group with the

> help of your date of birth. Check UR nature as per UR date of birth & have poll & the whole percentage will prove the fact.

Be Honest Please..

> Date of Birth Group

> 01,06,11,16,21,26,31 A1

> 02,07,12,17,22,27 B2

> 03,08,13,18,23,28 C3

> 04,09,14,19,24,29 D4

> 05,10,15,20,25,30 E5

> Group A1 >

You consider love as the most beautiful thing and

> you love to fall in love, but a number of your group

> members think that the person they love is not

> sincere with them.

> You love to be with your friends and you are always

> found to be a dutiful friend.

> You can hardly control your patients, which is a

> very big drawback of your nature.

> The Person who is ruling your mind & heart these

> days is perfect for you.

> Group B2

> Your dreams and ambitions are much important for you

> and you can do everything to fulfill your dreams.

> Love is much valuable in your life but you always

> search for someone perfect. You hardly trust

> someone.

> Your friends are really important for you but

> normally you hide a lot from them.

> You are a deep thinker you always study the negative

> view as well as positive.

> You can lead a happy life with a person for whom you

> care a lot these days.

> Group C3

> You always prefer mantel decisions more then

> emotional ones due to this you don't have a limited

> number of friends. You consider life a very

> beautiful gift and you love to enjoy its colors.

> There are a number of peoples who are your ideals

> and you loved to spend a big part of your time with

> them. You are found to be a very sincere lover.

> You have a perfect control on your emotions but

> sometimes your decisions really effect your

> beloveds.

> The person who has just appeared in your mind and

> you has decided to forward this mail especially to

> him/her is your real and special friend.

> Group D4

> Your always have goals to achieve and you can do

> everything to fulfill the dreams of those who loves

> you.

> You have a sketch of an ideal in your mind and you

> always search for that personality.

> Your friends means a lot to you and you can do

> everything for the sake of your friend, you a

> normally found to be an emotional personality.

> You have a very less control on your patients and

> due to this sometimes you over react.

> The one who sent you this mail & the one to whom you

> will send this mail first are your real friends.

> Group E5

> You are found to be a person who loves to love. You

> prefer emotional decision more then mantel

> decisions. You consider life just to enjoy; you are

> the one who is perfect to call FLURTIES.

> You love to increase the list of your friends and

> beloved's.

> You have a number of dreams but you never work hard

> to make your dreams come true which is the biggest

> drawback in your nature you take everything much

> lightly.

Story of a modern woodcutter (JOYce-5)

One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a

tree above a river, his axe fell into the river.

When he cried out, God appeared and asked," Why are you crying?"

The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water.

Then God went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe.

"Is this your axe?" God asked.

The woodcutter replied, "No."

God again went down and came up with a silver axe.

"Is this your axe?" he asked.

Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."

God went down again and came up with an iron axe. "Is this your axe?" God asked.

The woodcutter replied," Yes."

God was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him

all three axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happily.

One day while he was walking with his wife along the

riverbank, the woodcutter's wife fell into the river.

When he cried out,God again appeared and asked him,

"Why are you crying?"

"Oh God , my wife has fallen into the water!"

God went down into the water and came up with Jennifer Lopez.

"Is this your wife?" he asked.

"Yes," cried the woodcutter.

God was furious. "You cheat! That is an untruth!"

The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me God . It is a misunderstanding.

You see, if I said 'no' to Jennifer Lopez,

You will come up with Catherine Zeta-Jones.

Then if I also say 'no' to her, You wi l l come up with my wife, and I will say 'yes,'

and then all three will be given to me.

But God , I am a poor man and I will not be able to

take care of all three wives, so *that's* why I said 'yes' this time.

Sorry Gentleman I can't be serious all the time !

The moral of the story is whenever a man lies it is

for an honourable and useful reason

see....we're not so bad after allllllll !!

Wonderful !!!

I am proud of your collection JOYce... Keep Positing...

Aman

Thanx a lot for UR appriciation. But i have a problem to do so. Coz there is no such parameter to evaluate my (or anyonez else) posting, wheather how good or bad they R. I found most of the community only want to feel the sea from shore & never take any libirty to put their efforts in between. Even most of them cant post thier felling bout the postings. Then how can u expect good litrature when there is no evaluation & no critisism, which is the must as per me.

SSA

Yeh Ok?..

Another way to put is ..stress is our over-reaction to everyday life. We worry too much about everything!

Exactly, But i follow the following principle to handle things.........

KHAO PIYO KARO ANAND,

BHANDDE MANJE PARMANAND...

Well, nice to have someone on the board from Ludhiana..

But, haven't you posted like the exact same stuff before as well?? :?

Yeah But someone pointout me that was not the proper place to do so that is why i M here again. Hey M I the single one from Ludhiana/Chandigarh as U mentioned. Please let me know.

Thanx

Salutations,

Yes, a question, where have we go wrong. U has raised a good question my dear fellow Lady. As per my approach this is nothing but the all the power of duplication which coz leads our society (no matter it belongs to Sikhism or Muslim), nowhere but to only a well which hasn’t any water of Moral values & self esteem.

It is not only Mehndi or not only Karva-Chauth in duplications question, but it is all from a new dress upto a new Merc-Benz, from diamond ring for engagement up to a very expensive marriage ceremony. It all belongs to the power of duplication. We can’t blame our children to have such reaction from them coz we encourage them to do so. Where we wrong is only the lack of moral values in ourselves, which R must required to prevent such practices and we can’t expect all those to nourish from the children. But if we really expect such values from our children then we have to adapt them in our behavior. It is not our book-wounding which coz or lead us to do so.

It is a in Human Psycology that all our children/fellows/disciples (sometime even our friends & elders) follows only our action and not our words.

Thanx

Joyce

Friends here i m posting a small but must required changes which is becoming the neccessaty to change our socity upto the level of worth living. As per great managemnet thinkers if we only change ourselves then we did the most of our part to help sociaty upto that level to improve sociaty for worth living. Check what U & me can do in OURz share...

" It is never the ACTIVITY of RASCALS that destroys a

society, but always the INACTIVITY of the GOOD PEOPLE

that does it. "

" IF INJUSTICE is happening to your neighbour and you

can SLEEP, WAIT for your turn. You are NEXT. "

" If a citizen does not OPPOSE injustice and CRIME,

then he is encouraging it. "

" Hands that serve HUMANITY are a lot better than lips

that talk of DIVINITY. "

" We are SUFFERING because citizens have GIVEN and

TAKEN VOTES based on CASTE/ RELIGION and not

PRINCIPLES. "

" Today's PROBLEMS are the results of yesterday's

SHORT SIGHTED SOLUTIONS. "

" Citizens & nations reveal their CHARACTER by the way

they treat their ELDERLY and the DISABLED. "

" People who vote for bad LEADERS, are not TRUSTING

them, but TRADING with them. "

" We have to PROTECT not only what we have inherited,

but what we are leaving for our CHILDREN. "

" Good leaders SERVE THE NATION, bad leaders make the

NATION SERVE THEM. "

" If JUSTICE is worth having - it's worth FIGHTING

for. "

" Those who we would not trust as GUARDIANS of our

children - why do we make them guardians of our

NATION? "

" A society that cannot protect the RESPECT and

DIGNITY of its WOMEN and CHILDREN has no right to

exist. "

" Where LAWLESSNESS becomes the law, HONEST CITIZENS

become cheats, crooks and dacoits. "

" A Society becomes VIOLENT where EXPLOITATION is the

essence of EXISTENCE. "

" More than CHARITY - what is desired today is

JUSTICE. "

" A nation suffers when POPULAR OPINIONS become more

important than VALUES & JUSTICE. "

" A society is in DANGER when those who have never

learned to OBEY are given the right to COMMAND. "

" Citizens who value their PRIVILEGES over principles,

end up LOSING both. "

" It is CRUELTY to the INNOCENT when the GUILTY go

UNPUNISHED. "

" Under pressure, PREFERENCES become weak whereas

CONVICTIONS become even STRONGER. "

" Unjust GOVERNANCE is organised EXPLOITATION. "

" Those who give up FREEDOM to purchase temporary

SAFETY deserve neither freedom nor safety. "

" Educating the MIND without moral creates a MANIAC in

society. "

" Unprincipled ALLIANCES keep recycling old TRASH and

discourage fresh TALENT. "

" Bad leaders take MONEY from the rich, VOTE from the

poor, promising to protect one from the other. "

" Anyone who PROFITS from CRIME is a part of it. No

crime is VICTIMLESS. "

" UNJUST nations invite their own PAIN and FREEDOM

cannot prevail in a CORRUPT society. "

" WEAK people can never be SINCERE - COWARDS can never

practice MORALITY. "

TOLERANCE beyond the point of absurdity is not a

VIRTUE but COWARDICE. "

" A Society depends more on its citizens' CHARACTER

than their INTELLIGENCE. "

" Future LEADS the willing and DRAGS the unwilling. "

" CORRUPT governance neither lets its citizen LIVE

with DIGNITY nor DIE with DIGNITY. "

" To a DEVIOUS person, a CROOKED path looks straight.

" The INFLUENTIAL get the BAIL, REST get the JAIL. "

" GOOD people PRAY for others, while RASCALS PREY on

others. "

" TERRORISM is a SIN and ACCEPTANCE of it is a bigger

sin. "

" Lack of JUSTICE makes citizens lose respect for the

LAW. "

" OPPORTUNISTS say, "Whatever LITTLE BIT I can do, I

will do." CONCERNED citizens say, "Whatever the NATION

takes to do, I will do.

" India is not the first country with PROBLEMS, but is

amongst the first few not coming up with SOLUTIONS. "

from the Pen Point of a great management thinker 'SHIV KHERA'

Hello Friends,

I dont know i how to intro.. myself to u, anyhow i m trying....

This is Jaswant 24 an MCA doing my MBAz, basically from Ludhiana, The Iron City.

I have different taste of interests, a few of them R....

I Love Speed, no matter that is of man or of machine.

I Love high tech Gadgets & Devices and movies.

I have a lot of friends & all R have some dynamic qualities(I hope U'll be the next in my list....waiting)

I Love to have my own Rules & Regulations for life.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Hey ask personally for more......

Regards.

Hello Friends here are some hard facts bout some countries which ensurely increase UR GK have a reading on these ones....

Facts about countries

Facts about America:

* Americans eat 45000 burgers per minute.

* Tomato Ketchup was once used as medicine in the

United States. Was

sold as "Dr.Miles Compound Extract of Tomato".

Facts about South America:

* Amazon, a gigantic system of rivers and forests,

supplies 1/5th of the

world's oxygen. Now that's the reason why these

forests should be

conserved.

* La paz, the capital city of Bolivia, is the world's

highest

city(3600m).

* Brazil is the only country to have played in every

World Cup Soccer

Tornament.

Facts about India:

* The largest employer in the world is the Indian

Railways, employing

over one million people.

* "Shankar's International Doll Museum" has one of the

largest collections of costume dolls in the world.

Each doll is handcrafted.

* Over 800 full-length feature films are produced

every year in 14 languages. This amounts to more than2 films being produced every day.

Facts about Italy:

* Vatican City is the smallest city in the world. And

the only country

within a country.

* Leonardo Da Vinci painted the Mona Lisa on a piece

of pinewood in

1506.

* The youngest Pope was 11 years old.

* Napolean was not born in France. He was born in a

small island named

Corsica. But he was born on the day when France gained

control over

Corsica from Italy. So he was born in France.

Confused??

* Leonardo da Vinci invented the scissors.

Facts about France:

* The world's first landing field for UFOs was

installed in Ares, France

on 15th August 1976.

* The actual height of the Eiffel Tower is 984 feet.

But it grows by 6

inches in summer, as metal expands. And shrinks back

to normal in the

winter, as metal contracts.

* All good things come to an end....but so fast?? King

Louis XIX ruled

France for a total of fifteen minutes.

Facts about England:

* Big Ben is actually the name of the largest bell

inside the clock

tower, and not the clock.

* In England in 1880s, "pants" was considered to be a

dirty word.

* The tower of London has served as a fortress, a

prison, a place of

worship, an arsenal, the Royal Mint, the original

London zoo, the Royal

Armories, the Record office, and as the residence of

kings and queens.

* The Buckingham Palace, home to the Royal family, has

602 rooms.

Facts about Australia:

* The Aborigines were the first to migrate to

Australia from Asia about

40,000 years ago.

* A male Kangaroo is called a "boomer", and a female

kangaroo is called

a "flyer".

* McDonalds Olympic Restaurants served nearly 1.5

million sandwiches,

188 tonnes of Potatoes and 12000 kilos of lettuce to

athletes, coaches,

officials and spectators during the Sydney Olympics

2000.

Facts about New Zealand:

* One of the hills in the North Island, New Zealand is

named

"TAUMATAWHAKATANGIHANGAKOAUAUOTAMATEATURIPUKAKAPIKLIMAUNGAHORONUKUPOKAIWH

ENU

AKITANATAHU." (PHEW!)

* The Kea Bird lives in New Zealand and likes to eat

the rubber around

the car windows.

* Kiwis, found only in the New Zealand, have whiskers

for feeling in the

dark.

Facts about Middle East:

* Camel is the ship of the desert. But if you were to

shave a camel, it

would die in the desert.

* Experts believe that we have already used 1/3rd of

the world's supply

of petrol. And it will be totally exhausted by 2050.

* Perfumes, an integral part of the Arabs, are

traditionally classified

in three types: Attar, Bukhoor and Wax Sachet.

* The Arabian Stallion is the oldest pure-bred horse

in the world. The

most famous Arab horses are known as the "Bedouin

Arabs".

* The Iranians were among the first carpet-weavers.

Facts about China:

* In the underground city in China, there are

factories, warehouses,

shops, hotels, theatres, roller skating rinks and

clinics. The only

thing u do not get is sunshine.

* The Great Wall of China is 1500 miles long and can

be seen from outer

space.

* The tooth brush was invented in China in 1498.

Facts about Africa:

* A Hippo can open its mouth wide enough to fit a 4 ft

tall child

inside. Nothing to worry, though....they are

herbivorous!

* The animals believe that the white colour means

"Danger" or "Caution".

So when on an African Safari, its advisable not to

wear white, as it may

scare away animals.

Facts about North Pole:

* Penguin is the only BIRD that can swim, but not fly.

* Did u always think that the Polar Bear's fur is

white? Well, u were

wrong! Its actually clear. It appears white because it

reflects the

sunlight.

* The word Eskimo means "eater of raw flesh".

* There are more than 100 words for "ice" in the

language of the

Eskimos.

* For a cool summer vacation, check in at "The Ice

Hotel" in Swedish

Lapland. This hotel is a large Igloo. and includes a

restaurant, a

cinema and a wedding chappel.

* An average iceberg weighs 20,000,000 tonnes.

Facts about Egypt:

* To look more attractive, the Egyptian women invented

the "Lip-stick".

* 2 million stone blocks were used to build a pyramid.

And each weighed more than a school bus.

* Ancient Egyptians slept on pillows made of stone.

stress (str s): A mentally or emotionally disruptive or upsetting condition occurring in response to adverse external influences and capable of affecting physical health, usually characterized by increased heart rate, a rise in blood pressure, muscular tension, irritability, and depression. (phew!)

How to Relieve Stress

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point

a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want

fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "in"

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has

Gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors".

7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy."

8. Don't use any punctuation marks

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they

answer.

11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle

sounds all day.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their

party because you're not in the mood.

16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock

Hard Kim.

17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won!", "I won!" "3rd

time this week!!!!!"

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot,

yelling "run for your lives, they're loose!!"

19. Tell your children over dinner. "due to the economy, we are going

to have to let one of you go."

Sometimes fortune lead to u there u never expect in such way..... don't belive then read on ................

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen

shaking

frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some

kind of wire running

from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending

to jolt him away

from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy

plank of wood,

breaking his arm in two places. Up to that moment, he

had been happily

listening to his Walkman.

_______________________________________________

Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the

cruelty of sending

pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany. Suddenly,

all two thousand

pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence,

stampeding madly

The two hopeless protesters were trampled to death.

____________________________________________

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough

postage on a letter

bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on

it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was

blown to bits..

Fire authorities in California found a corpse in a

burned-out section

of forest while assessing the damage done by a forest

fire. The

deceased male was dressed in a full wet suit, complete

with scuba tanks

on his back, flippers, and face mask.

A postmortem test revealed that the man died not from

burns, but from

massive internal injuries. Dental records provided a

positive

identification. Investigators then set about to

determine how a fully

clothed diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire.

It was revealed that on the day of the fire, the man

went diving off

the coast, some 20 miles from the forest. The fire

fighters, seeking to

control the fire as quickly as possible, had called in

a fleet of

helicopters with very large dip buckets. Water was

dipped from the

ocean and emptied at the site of the forest fire.

You guessed it. One minute our diver was making like

Flipper in the

Pacific, the next, he was doing the breast stroke in a

fire dip bucket

300 feet in the air. Some days it just doesn't pay to

get out of bed.

___________________________________________

A man was working on his motorcycle on the patio, his

wife nearby in

the kitchen. While racing the engine, the motorcycle

accidentally

slipped into gear. The man, still holding onto the

handlebars, was

dragged along as it burst through the glass patio

doors.

His wife, hearing the crash, ran in the room to find

her husband cut

and bleeding, the motorcycle, and the shattered patio

door. She called

for an ambulance and, because the house sat on a

fairly large hill,

went down the several flights of stairs to meet the

paramedics and

escort them to her husband.

While the attendants were loading her husband, the

wife managed to

right the motorcycle and push it outside. She also

quickly blotted up

the spilled gasoline with some paper towels and tossed

them into the

toilet.

After being treated and released, the man returned

home, looked at the

shattered patio door and the damage done to his

motorcycle. He went

into the bathroom and consoled himself with a

cigarette while attending

to his business. About to stand, he flipped the butt

between his legs.

The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud

explosion and her

husband screaming. Finding him lying on the bathroom

floor with his

trousers blown away and burns on his buttocks, legs

and groin, she once

again phoned for an ambulance. The same paramedic crew

was dispatched.

As the paramedics carried the man down the stairs to

the ambulance they

asked the wife how he had come to burn himself. She

told them. They

started laughing so hard, one slipped, the stretcher

and dumping the

husband out. He fell down the remaining stairs,

breaking his arm.

______________________________________________

.

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the

Exxon Valdez oil

spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony,

two of the most

expensively saved animals were being released back

into the wild amid

cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in

full view, a

killer whale ate them both.

_____________________________________________

Hope your day is better than this!

FAITH

An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his class on, “The problem science has with Krishna”. He asks one of his new students to stand and.....

Professor: You are a Hare Krishna devotee, aren't you, son?

Student: Yes, sir.

Prof: So you believe in God?

Student: Absolutely, sir.

Prof: Is God good?

Student: Sure.

Prof: Is God all-powerful?

Student: Yes.

Prof: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to Krishna to heal him. Most of us

would attempt to help others who are ill. But Krishna didn't. How is this Krishna good then? Hmm?

(The student is silent.)

Prof: You can't answer, can you? Let's start Again, young fellow. Is God good?

Student: Yes.

Prof: Is Satan good?

Student: No.

Prof: Where does Satan come from?

Student: From...God...

Prof: That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?

Student: Yes.

Prof: Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything. Correct?

Student: Yes.

Prof: So who created evil?

(The student does not answer.)

Prof: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in

the world, don't they?

Student: Yes, sir.

Prof: So, who created them?

(The student has no answer.)

Prof: Tell me, son. Do you believe in Krishna?

Student: Yes, professor, I do.

Prof: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around

you. Have you ever seen Krishna?

Student : No, sir.

Prof: Tell us if you have ever heard your Krishna?

Student: No, sir.

Prof: Have you ever felt your Krishna, tasted your Krishna, smelt your Krishna? Have

you ever had any sensory perception of Krishna or God for that matter?

Student: No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.

Prof: Yet you still believe in Him?

Student: Yes.

Prof: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your Krishna

doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?

Student: Nothing. I only have my faith.

Prof: Yes, Faith. And that is the problem science has.

Student: Professor, is there such a thing as heat?

Prof: Yes.

Student: And is there such a thing as cold?

Prof: Yes.

Student: No sir. There isn't.

(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)

Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat,

a little heat or no heat. But we don't have anything called Cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.

(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)

Student: What about darkness, professor? Is there such a thing as Darkness?

Prof: Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?

Student: You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have

low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light.....But if you have no light

constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In reality, darkness isn't. If it were you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?

Prof: So what is the point you are making, young man?

Student: Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.

Prof: Flawed? Can you explain how?

Student: Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is Life and then

there is Death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought. It uses electricity and Magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me, professor. Do you teach tour students

that they evolved from a monkey?

Prof: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.

Student: Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?

(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)

Student: Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot

even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher?

(The class is in uproar.)

Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the professor's brain?

(The class breaks out into laughter)

Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the professor's brain, felt it, touched or

smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?

(The room is silent. The professor stares at the student, his face Unfathomable.)

Prof: I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.

Student: That is it sir. The link between man & GOD is FAITH. That is all that keeps things moving & alive.

Love All Serve All .......Be Happy Always.

HUMAN RELATIONSHIP (JOYCE-4)

A boy was born to a couple after eleven years of marriage. They were a

loving couple and the boy was the apple of their eyes.

One morning, the husband saw a medicine bottle open. As he was late

for work, he asked the wife to cap the bottle and keep it in the

cupboard. The mother, who was preoccupied in the kitchen, totally

forgot the matter.

The boy playfully went to the medicine bottle and, fascinated with its

color, drank it all. It happened to be a poisonous medicine meant for

adults in small dosages. When the child showed signs of poisoning,

the mother took him to the hospital, where he died.

The mother was stunned. She was too terrified to face her husband.

When the distraught father came to the hospital and saw the dead

child, he looked at his wife and uttered just four words.

QUESTIONS :

1. What were the four words ?

2. What is the implication of this story ?

Check with the answers only after you have tried to come up with your

own.

Please scroll down ...........

ANSWERS:

The husband just said " I Love You Darling ."

The husband's totally unexpected reaction is proactive behavior.

He is indeed a genius in human relationships.

The child is dead.

He can never be brought back to life. There is no point in finding

fault with the mother. She had also lost her only child. What she

needed at that moment was consolation and sympathy from the husband.

That is what he gave her. If everyone can look at life with this kind

of perspective, there would be much fewer problems in the world.

"A journey of a thousand miles, begins with a single step."

Take off all your unforgiveness, fear, envies, jealousies and

selfishness, AND you will find things are actually not so difficult as

you think.

Salutations Gentelman,

I think Khalaism dont reuired a place to be uploud.

COZ

Khalaism is a Revolution,

Khalaism is a Stream,

Khalaism is a Ardass,

Khalaism is a Dedication,

Khalaism is a Supreme Spirit,

Khalaism is a Holy Felling,

Khalaism is a path shower,

Khalaism is a process (to purify every aspect of Khalsa),

COZ

Khalaism is a not a mission,

Khalaism is a not a destination,

Khalaism is a not a one time job,

.

.

.

.

.

Khalsaism dont required a place to flourish. It must be in the hearts & minds of people not on to a piece of Land.

So .... Make UR opinion bywise....

Hey Friends Check some more Links

http://onlinebooks.library.upenn.edu/

www.microsoft.com/reader/promotions/free_shop.asp

www.ebookdirectory.com/

www.free-ebooks.net/

www.ebuqs.com/

www.web-books.com/cool/ebooks/Library.htm

http://www.perseus.tufts.edu/

http://memory.loc.gov/

http://www.diglib.org/use.htm

http://webclient.alexandria.ucsb.edu/

http://www.icdlbooks.org/

http://www.olypen.com/harmon/fdl/

" Become a good role model. Set a good example by your

behavior. "

" Wise people learn from their mistakes but wiser

people learn from others

mistakes."

" Making a mistake is not the end of the world but

repeating it certainly can

be."

" Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today

is a gift, thats why we

call it the present."

" People don't care how much you know, they want to

know how much you care."

" It's never too late to show kindness."

" Laugh with people not at them."

" Money becomes a blessing or a curse by the way we

use or abuse it."

" Don't gossip. People who gossip with you also gossip

about you."

" It is better to be alone than in bad company."

" Jealous people: Their own problems don't bother them

as much as other people's

successes bother them."

" Give sincere appreciation to others. Don't flatter.

Appreciation comes from

the heart, flattering comes from the mouth."

" Make your parents proud and give a great heritage of

values to your children."

" Pick your mentors and role models carefully as they

can lead or mislead you."

" Never look for a job. Always look for a career."

" Don't try to buy friendship. Stay away from the

people who do that."

" Take initiative. Don't wait for things to happen.

Make them happen."

" Personalities without principles make life

miserable."

" Judge a persons character not only by how they make

a living but also how they

spend it."

" Choose your advisors based on values and not on

convenience."

" Learn to be nice to people. It is nice to be

important but it is more important to be nice."

" Learn to express your opinions but don't talk back

to others. Learn the art of disagreeing without being

disagreeable."

" Become labeled as trustworthy and a person of

integrity, because our credibility affects our

profitability not

only in money but also in goodwill."

" Choose your friends carefully. We reveal our

character not only by the company we keep but also by

the company we

avoid."

" Return what you borrow on time as it builds

credibility."

" Don't cheat as it becomes a habit and habits form

character."

" Be well groomed because you never get a second

chance to create a first

impression."

" Never take anything without asking permission

because borrowing without

permission is stealing."

" Be polite, courteous and sensitive to others

feelings. It shows compassion."

" Remember you have freedom of choice but not freedom

of consequences so make

your choices carefully."

" Accept constructive criticism in a positive manner.

It only shows that the

giver cares."

" Honour is more important than Honours."

" Do the right thing for the right reason."

" Success is getting what you want, happiness is

wanting what you get."

" Do not disclose anything told in confidence."

" Be a good listener. Listening shows caring and makes

the other person feel

important."

" Practice courtesy. Don't complete the other persons

sentence."

" Don't whisper in the company of the others. It's bad

manners."

" Our actions and inactions can be hurtful to

ourselves and others."

" There is no accomplishment without activity.

However, all activity does not result in

accomplishment."

Joyce-3 THE WRITING ON THE WALL

A weary mother returned from the store, Lugging groceries through the kitchen door. Awaiting her arrival was her young son, Anxious to say what his brother had done.

"While I was out playing and Dad was on a call, Tommy took his crayons and wrote on the wall!

It's on the new paper you hung in the den. I told him you'd be mad to have to do it again!"

She let out a moan and furrowed her brow, "Where is your little brother right now?"

She put down the food and with a purposeful stride, She marched to his closet where he had gone to hide.

She called his full name as she entered his room. He trembled with fear - he knew that meant doom!

For the next ten minutes, she ranted and raved About the wallpaper, and how she had saved,

And all of the work it would take to repair, What a bad boy he was and how he didn't care.

The more she scolded, the madder she got, Then she stomped from his room, completely distraught.

She stomped into the den to confirm her fears. When she saw the wall, her eyes flooded with tears.

The message in crayon pierced her soul with a dart. It said, "I Love Mommy," surrounded by a heart.

Well, she left the wallpaper just as she found it, With an empty picture frame hung to surround it.

A reminder to her, and indeed to all, To take time to read the writing on the wall.

Joyce-2 A GOOD FRIEND

In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high

esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, "Do you

know what I just heard about your friend?"

"Hold on a minute," Socrates replied. "Before telling me anything I'd

like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."

"Triple filter?"

"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my

friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you're going to say. That's why I call it the triple filter test.

The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what

you are about to tell me is true?"

"No," the man said, "actually I just heard about it and..."

"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or

not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?"

"No, on the contrary..."

"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about

him, but you're not certain it's true. You may still pass the test though,

because there's one filter left: the filter of usefulness. Is what you want

to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really."

"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither

true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?

Hello Friends,

This is Jaswant. I m going to start a new series in which i'll post a few stories periodically. I expect the same from u. If u cant do that at least have a reading on them & put UR comments. I hope u'll help me to refine my collection & real purpose of this series to motivate youth.

Thankx & JOY(ce)

MEASURE OF CHARACTER

When William McKinley was President of the United States, he had to make a decision about the appointment of an ambassador to a foreign country. Two candidates were equally qualified.

While McKinley was still a Congressman, he had observed an inconsiderate action by one of the men. He recalled boarding a streetcar at the rush hour and getting the last vacant seat. Soon an elderly woman got on, carrying a heavy clothesbasket. No one got up to offer her a seat, so she walked the length of the car and stood in the aisle, hardly able to keep her balance as the vehicle swayed from side to side.

One of the men McKinley was later to consider for ambassador was sitting next to where the woman was standing. Instead of getting up and helping her, he deliberately shifted his newspaper so it would look like he hadn't seen her. When McKinley noticed this, he walked down the aisle, graciously took her basket, and offered her his seat.

The man was unaware that anyone was watching, but that one little act of selfishness would later deprive him of perhaps the crowning honor of his lifetime.

"The measure of a person's character is what he would do if he thought he would never be found out."

Nice Inspiring Story Indeed... but are you sure that this story was narrated by your friend... :roll:

Thanx for compliment. My dear friend, friendship(or any other relation) has only a single stone of foundation what we call TRUST. I hadnt any gadget to check that is she saying a true or lie to me. I have trust in her & see a shine of turth. That is why i narrate it without any hesitation. I hope u'll not mind my words.

Regards

Hello Friends,

I dont know i how to intro.. myself to u, anyhow i m trying....

This is Jaswant 24 an MCA doing my MBAz, basically from Ludhiana, The Iron City.

I have different taste of interests, a few of them R....

I Love Speed, no matter that is of man or of machine.

I Love high Gadgets & Devices.

I have a lot of friends & all R have some dynamic qualities(I hope U'll be the next in my list....waiting)

I Love to have my own Rules & Regulations for life.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Hey ask personally for more......

Regards.

Hello friends,

I dont know how to intro myself, anyhow i m trying ..........

This is Jaswant 24, an MCA doing my MTech. basically from Ludhiana, The Iron City.

I have a different taste of interests.

I love speed, no matter of man or of machine.

Loves High tech gadgets.

Love to make my own Rules & Regulations.

Love to have a lot of but dynamic friend(s).

Do U want to be one of them.

Waiting...................