CdnSikhGirl

3 minutes ago, GurpreetKaur said:

Is that a Sikh guy? Why is he wearing a Mughal style cap?

 

Is that a Sikh woman? Why is she wearing a choli?

Above two pictures, women need to switch so it can make sense .

The photo I posted the Singh is wearing kacheras... and the turban style is Nihung style... in fact nihung Singhnis have always tied dastars.  

I agree, the skimpy choli is not becoming of a Singhni.  She looks like a bimbo showing off her body.  And rehetnamas ALL are clear that kesh must be covered at all times, so even if a SInghni chooses not to tie turban (as per SRM being optional) then she should still cover with a chunni.  However as I posted above, both taksal maryada and nihung maryada explicitly state it's required of both males and females to tie a keski / dastar. Whether or not they do it consistently is a different story. But ALL of the Nihung SInghnis I know tie dastars and were told they were required to when they took amrit. 

Yes I have seen this too... recently even. My friend is Ramgarhia background and her Father really wanted her to marry another Ramgarhia.  Why? If caste was removed then why does it matter?  Good thing my husband's family was not into this thinking at all. Or else I'd be considered untouchable  having no caste LOL. Actually his family treat women as equal too. There is no expectation of men having higher status or respect.  And even Panj Pyaras where we took Amrit declared women too can do any position men can in Sikhi (including Panj Pyaras).  I am thankful Kashmir Sikhs seem to be very open and inclusive. 

I'll just say the truth... Sikhi TEACHES equality of everyone including gender. Some don't follow it however...

59 minutes ago, GurpreetKaur said:

Go to sleep, it's pretty late. 

oh lol. Different time zones :)

Actually due to the fact that many confuse us with Muslims it HAS come up. I did this event last year and was asked why I converted when women are treated inferior... They assumed Sikhi was a sect of Islam. But even outside of mistaken identity we have our own issues with gender equality and I know it will come up. Because they genuinely want to know how I could covert to a religion where I would have less rights and equality than *supposedly* Christianity (if only they knew what the bible says about women)... Anyway I can't avoid it. All I can do is answer that the religion does teach equality and equal rights but not everyone practices it (due to culture influence etc) 

The display is tomorrow.  

Everyone will have shoes and at least the military members will have headdress so their heads will be covered.  I could do it so that if they want to see I can hold the page open for them to see, instead of letting them handle it themselves.  Of course that might cause more negative feelings... the idea is to show all the positives and educate the public. 

After all the conversations on here, I don't know what to answer when they will ask the inevitable question about men / women and equality.  I want to say yes. And most websites say Sikhi sees both as equals. That there are no extra restrictions on women, nothing reserved for only men etc. But then after conversations on here, it's apparent that at least some Sikhs see women as inferior, including impurity with menstruation wrt seva, disallowing women to be one of Panj Pyaras, telling wives they must see their husband as 'God' (parmeshwar) and that the husband has higher status than the wife. That wives must be obedient (but husbands never have to be obedient to their wives). etc.  Limitation of seva at Darbar sahib etc.  So I don't know really what to say and being female I know I will be asked especially being a convert. I used to declare very confidently that yes men and women are seen as equals, until I started seeing that other Gurdwaras and specific groups do not treat women as equal at all.  It's even been suggested on here that being born in a female body is a punishment for karma and is considered a 'downgrade' to a male body. So what do I say when people ask??  Do I continue to confidently say women and men are equal in Sikhi - Do I say that Gurbani and Sikhi teach that we are all equal but *some* do not practice it? Or do I say that it's a misnomer that Sikhi sees everyone as equal and instead women are seen in a lower position to men? 

It is obviously being done for respect... however if it comes to a point of blankets for SGGSJ or blankets for a person in need who is suffering in the cold... then what do we do? What would Guru Nanak Dev Ji do? I'm not saying not to do these things. But what I am asking is, do we do these things at a higher importance than helping someone in need of those same things? 

As part of a military event, I have gotten the Gurdwara involved to do a table / display.  We will have posters (mostly Sikh in WW1-WW2 etc. And some pamphlets on what Sikhi is.  I also have an extra kirpan, gatra, simrana, kara, kanga etc.  I will bring for the table.  

My question is, would it be a bad idea to bring a nitnem gutka? Keeping in mind the public (DND military personell and their families) will be there.  On the one hand, I worry about people handling it  but on the other hand if they can see for themselves what is contained in the banis, it goes a LONG way to understanding and seeing that Sikhi is not in any way violent etc.  (since we all know that Sikhs are often wrongly misunderstood in this area).  The one I have extra here is the Sacred Nitnem one with transliteration and English along with the Gurmukhi.  

IDERD = International Day For Elimination of Racial Discrimination

6 minutes ago, GurpreetKaur said:

So jayo.. Raat ho gee. 

What does this mean?

I can't say for UK for sure but I can speak about Canada but the process will be the same. I was just married in India in Sept 2015.  

If you are gori (Caucasian) and marrying a Punjabi Sikh under anand Karaj you will first need to change your name officially in your documents to last name Kaur. This is because of a hukamnama from 2007 from SGPC.  They want to be sure that anyone not born into Sikhi is actually serious about following Sikhi because anand Karaj can only be between two Sikhs. 

Also make sure you register your marriage right away with the registrar of marriages where you are (under new anand marriage act --- unless Jammu Kashmir then it's a bit more complicated. You will require this proof of marriage - both the marriage agreement (registration) and the marriage certificate. You get the certificate after the agreement is registered.  Without this paperwork UK will not give your spouse permanent residence. 

You will also need other proof of established relationship like photos, past Indian visas etc to show it wasn't a one off thing ( which indicates scam for green card type of thing).  They want to see you two have been together for awhile in a genuine relationship. Also photos from the marriage, invitations, etc.  Especially photos with your families involved. That way they know your family is supportive. Less chance it will be a scam if your family is participating in the wedding. 

Mother than that there is a lot of papers for the actual application. But that's where UK and Canada may differ in their process.  

I don't think that the instruction to see every girl as a sister (or male as brother) is supposed to be literal. I think it's more that when you meet someone don't sexualize them.  Consider them 'as' you would consider a sister... That is to say get to know their personality - get to know them. Consider them as a human instead of a walking vagina. Obviously you have to find someone who you have a deep connection with and that involves getting to know someone on a deeper level than if they were literally a sister. It's an entirely different dynamic. If there is noting there then don't marry. But it is possible to do this without sexualizing them. 

43 minutes ago, Gunahgar said:

@paapiman What are your thoughts bro ?  Whats your strategy to get married ?

Paapiman will never be married. He thinks women are disgusting and beneath him. 

46 minutes ago, kdsingh80 said:

So do humans take consent of cow's when they insert tube in them  to impregnate them so they can produce as much milk as Humans want?

Awesome point! Those who are against eating meat but condone dairy are big huge hypocrites! 
 

39 minutes ago, GurpreetKaur said:

True, topics like these and the crazy war we have been having over men and women should not be on a religious forums. You can get the mods to delete it, I requested, you can try now. 

Exactly... there shouldn't be a war between male / female at all! It's sad that religions are still trying to place limitations on one gender or give preference to the other under the guise of religion. Unfortunately when people are trying to tout said limitations and restrictions on one gender as a religious requirement then it very much DOES belong on a religious forum, or else change will never happen.  In the case of what I posted it directly to show how teaching that wives must be obedient to husbands, causes a LOT of harm! Until and unless the men see their wives as their equal, they will NEVER treat them on an equal level and abuse WILL happen. The way to solve it is to remove the teaching of inequality / superiority of one over the other.  Its the same as discussing the atrocities ISIS have committed you can't discuss how ISIS is in the wrong unless you understand what they have done.  This is a far cry from posting porn involving feces.  

Wow Paapiman really has no idea about menstruation of he thinks that pic of the statue is in any way representative! 

Women maybe lose less than 1 ounce of blood over their entire cycle. Enough to fill a tablespoon.... That statue is covered by enough red paint to look like a massacre!

Second there are hygiene products including internal ones. Someone wearing one of those internal ones you would NEVER know they were menstruating!! 

And finally Gurbani actually speaks against any idea of impurity and says only clean are those in who's mind the lord abides. Our gurus tried to remove this idea of impurity... Your mind is what is a disgusting act... Limiting people because of a biological function they have no control over. Shame on you. 

I am not surprised this is dera mentality and brahaminism. Goes right along with thinking women are not even fully human and are downgraded of male bodies or that women need to be reborn in a male joon to be luberated. sootak is a Hindu concept. If you want to be Hindu then be Hindu. 

To me there is nothing wrong or disgusting about any body function. Just use common sense for hygiene. I'm really sad that there are Singhs who think like this. You might cringe at a natural function... I cringe at the likes of you. 

Gurbani says meditate on him every day. We are supposed to read from SGGSJ every day. Some people have saroop of maharaj in their home. If they live alone and are a woman then what?? EVERY saroop is equal! This is nonsense. 

The reason men have to wash after ejaculating has nothing to do with dirtiness of the semen. Its because it was a sexual act   Which can be associated with kaam. Menstruation has nothing to do with kaam.

You mean to tell me a male who just ejaculated because of a sexy dream or watching porno etc can just wash up and then do seva of SGGSJ like it didn't happen, but a woman who is just experiencing a normal biological function given to her by Waheguru to create life, without having had any sexy thoughts or kaam involved, should be barred from that seva? THAT is what is disgusting act to me.  

Paapiman would be the same person who would bar a homeless man from reading Gurbani because he can't afford clean clothing etc.  To me this is wrong. Gurbani is for everyone.  Ask yourself, do you think the Gurus in human form would have avoided women menstruating and say they couldn't see that woman till she stopped bleeding? The human Gurus did not elevate themselves to some standard like a Brahman priest who couldn't bear to be around downtrodden and dirty things.  No, the Guru Nanak put himself on the level of the beggar, and homeless person. He served humanity.... now SGGSJ is our eternal Guru and you want to dictate who can approach when Guru Nanak would have accepted ANYONE. 

3 hours ago, GurpreetKaur said:

Also your story about woman swallowing and whatnot was not very appropriate either, we did not complain about it being taboo, stop assuming things all the time.

 

Probably because that was entirely different context. It was a case that shows how dangerous the whole 'wives must be obedient to their husbands' thing can actually be because it was a case of marital sexual abuse. Husband forcing wife into obedience to comply.  And I wasn't descriptive anyway except to say that's what he was forcing her to do. And it was not meant to entice people into looking at disgusting videos for kicks.  And it's a whole different level sexually speaking than eating feces!!!

There is an entirely different thing when someone narrates a situation that happened to show that it's bad or illustrate a situation or circumstance than it is to post links and titles of videos made for nothing more than fetish / shock value. 

 Maybe I have been too sheltered... 

10 minutes ago, GurpreetKaur said:

Lol cuz I wanted to see what is two girls ans one cup, he did not mention it will involve two girls eating poop, if he did I would not pull it up. @chatanga1 was it real poop btw? Lol.

Dont judge me lo @BhagatSingh watched the horse and man video, which I just read the news and I must say man it's creepy. It's about a horse doing a guy lol. 

 

I REALLY did NOT need to know that! 

Admins... can we please close this thread. It's disgusting and does not belong on a religious forum! 

btw this is a PRIME example why I have a hard time believing charitars were meant to have some deep spiritual meaning. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS.  People don't need disgusting ideas put in their heads that they may NEVER have had prior! Then they start looking at disgusting videos (maybe out of curiosity at first) then they start doing it more and become addicted to it. Humans easily become attracted to anything which is Taboo... simply because it's taboo!  

I refuse to be part of it!  I am not coming into this thread again. 

And admins... please... this is inappropriate IMO. 

Really I am surprised *and appalled* that some members on here actually watched disgusting videos.  You are all creeping me out. The people who make those videos do it for attention. They WANT you watch those disgusting things. @GurpreetKaur why did you even load those videos? Why even search for stuff like that? I have no idea what's on those videos you guys posted and I never will. Because I refuse to pull them up on google and watch them! Not interested at all! 

@Gunahgar bodily functions are just bodily functions. There is nothing inherently disgusting about them. There is nothing that needs to be revered or worshipped. They are just biological necessity to achieve an end.  Menstruation is no more gross than semen.  In reality neither are.  And neither are something to be revered either. They are like skin, and eyes, and hearts.  Only Waheguru should be revered and worshipped. 

Also keep in mind that ultimate reality is ONE in other words there is only ONE universal consciousness. Our separateness is illusion of Ego. The DOER the experiencer behind every entity is one and the same. There is only one consciousness. Meaning nothing is done by us. 

Page 813, Line 9
ਕਰਨੈਹਾਰੁ ਨ ਬੂਝਈ ਆਪੁ ਗਨੈ ਬਿਗਾਨਾ ॥੧॥
Karnaihār na būjẖ▫ī āp ganai bigānā. ||1||
The fool does not understand the Creator Lord; instead, he thinks that he himself is the doer. ||1||. Guru Arjan Dev   

So is it this state of amnesia of our true self who has forgotten who the doer is? If the same consciousness pervades ALL then there is free will... But it's the free will of the creator. Our built up false ego identity or haume is illusion. Essentially we are (all collectively) ONE. 

For more info:

http://www.gurbani.org/articles/webart161.htm

Do you guys REALLY need to talk about this??? It's a very few sick sick people who are deranged who do these things these abuses to animals!!! There is obviously something wrong with these people and they need to be locked up! We don't need to analyze what they do. Better not even knowing.

Again... I think I am going to hurl...  excuse me while I grab a bucket to puke in! 

Also, this is HUGE case of animal cruelty! 

Guest Ji I think regards to the reference the other Guest Ji was speaking about the reference the book Paapiman posted. Not the Gurbani tuk talking about only a brahamgyani can know the state of a brahamgyani. 

I see what the other guest means... If nobody can know except those in that state then the only way anyone else could know is if that person in that higher spiritual state shared it with others. But the book paapiman posted says not to share. So how does someone become labelled a Sant?? Does the Sant say "I'm a Sant" to others? Or do others say "hey this person is a sant"?? If it's the Sant saying they are then they are obviously sharing with others speaking about their spiritual achievements (the book paapiman posed says not to). If it's others declaring it then how can those others know if the spiritually elevated person never told them??

...I think I am going to hurl... 

On March 10, 2016 at 10:30 AM, KAuR P said:

My mother said that my dad said it will be difficult to find a suitable match for me. This is the main reason they are not allowing me but dad said that I can marry a amritdhari boy and later I can take amrit. Why should I depend on someone? I am strong enough to be me. If everyone starts to think like this no one will take amrit. Even boys. They can also think that they may not be able to find an amritdhari girl. That's not the right way. We should at least start. The rest of world will start by seeing us. This makes me really sad that my parents think like that. I used to think that they are always right. But no they are wrong here. I am fed off of this. 

I knew that was the reason!!!! Trust me there are many awesome great Amritdhari guys :).  I married a Singh from Srinagar Kashmir and he is missionary college trained. We are both Amritdhari. He was before I met him and we took it together when we married at the same historical gurdwara. He respects me as his equal (not inferior) and does not expect me to serve him or be his subordinate or his families new maid, as can happen in *some* Punjabi families. He follows Gurbani on marriage and equality. 

Trust me when I say you might have less to choose from while looking but you will end up with a higher quality husband! 

As for your hair it's easy to keep it especially if you learn to tie a dastar. It will always be protected and covered.