vikrampreet Posted July 8, 2013 Report Share Posted July 8, 2013 Hello, I am an 18-year-old Sikh who has taken amrit. I am starting university next month at a secular school here in the US. I will be living in the dormitory, where I will have roommates and the communal bathroom and shower is down the hall from our bedroom. I am concerned about the propriety of removing my turban and caring for my kesh in this situation. My kesh is six feet long and it is quite time-consuming to remove my turban, unbraid, wash, comb, dry and braid the kesh, and replace the turban. If I wear my turban into the shower stall, remove it, bathe, care for my kesh and replace the turban before I exit, I will inconvenience my fellow-students by taking so much time in the shower. But that is the only private place I can envision where I will not expose my kesh to others. Does anyone have any advice? Thank you very much, Vik 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalsingh101 Posted July 9, 2013 Report Share Posted July 9, 2013 Why do you think it is negative for someone to see your kesh? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vikrampreet Posted July 9, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 9, 2013 My upbringing is you don't remove your turban in public. Public to me means people in a dorm who aren't related to me. I just don't feel like I'm being observant. Am I over reacting? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BhagatSingh Posted July 9, 2013 Report Share Posted July 9, 2013 Yeah definitely. It's ok to remove your pagg in public. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalsingh101 Posted July 9, 2013 Report Share Posted July 9, 2013 Just a personal opinion here. Getting weird about letting people see your hair is probably only going to make you appear strange. Be proud of your kesh and learn to be more confident/relaxed about it. You're not committing any 'sin' by letting a nonSikh or nonfamily member see your kesh man! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BhagatSingh Posted July 9, 2013 Report Share Posted July 9, 2013 Your post reminded me of this video. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vikrampreet Posted July 9, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 9, 2013 lol, thanks. My parents are just really strict about this. My father thinks taking off your turban is like taking off your pants. Nice to know not everyone is like that. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalsingh101 Posted July 9, 2013 Report Share Posted July 9, 2013 My father thinks taking off your turban is like taking off your pants. What the........ lol Sometimes it's actually a good idea to ignore the old school ways.....I'd say this is such a case. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BhagatSingh Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 Dally you don't get it. When a part of the body is covered all the time, you feel uncomfortable when you uncover it in front of others. So it IS like taking off your pants. But you can get used to taking off your pants and then it's no longer a big deal. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalsingh101 Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 Dally you don't get it. When a part of the body is covered all the time, you feel uncomfortable when you uncover it in front of others. So it IS like taking off your pants. But you can get used to taking off your pants and then it's no longer a big deal. No I get it. I just feel sometimes apnay in diasporas get (understandably) self conscious because outsiders make them feel different in a world that operates on a conformist 'everyone should look the same' basis. Some people handle looking different easily whilst it isn't so easy for others. What Sikh parents shouldn't do is make this overly 'self-conscious' thing unnecessarily greater than it needs to be in their children, because it just has the effect of knocking people's confidence - often making them withdrawn. And Singhs shouldn't be like that, they should be confident lions. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BhagatSingh Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 When you were growing up, what was your experience with your parents ? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalsingh101 Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 I was keshdhari as a very little boy but someone in my family (don't knwo who) decided to cut my hair. I don't remember it and the older lot never talk about it. I wouldn't have even known if there wasn't the odd piece of photographic evidence of me with a guthee! lol So I'm not sure if my personal experiences apply. What I was trying to get at was the self-consciousness some Sikh brothers with dastaars show, and I say SOME here purposefully because certain brothers with dastaars I know are super confident and conversely I know plenty of monay who are insecure mofos compared to many keshdhari Sikhs I know. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vikrampreet Posted July 10, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 I'm not self conscious about wearing a turban. I would be self conscious without it. But then people would be staring at a guy with six foot long hair. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalsingh101 Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 I'm not self conscious about wearing a turban. I would be self conscious without it. But then people would be staring at a guy with six foot long hair. Long hair is cool dude! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalsingh101 Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 Make sure you've got it conditioned and nicely combed and flaunt that s**t! When you are chillaxing you should wear like a jura on the back of the head. That just looks awesome! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vikrampreet Posted July 10, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 Okay, maybe I *am* too self-conscious if I'm worried about how my religion requires me to cover my head as I'm walking from the shower to the dorm room, but I am definitely too genuinely observant to just ditch the turban completely. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalsingh101 Posted July 10, 2013 Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 Okay, maybe I *am* too self-conscious if I'm worried about how my religion requires me to cover my head as I'm walking from the shower to the dorm room, but I am definitely too genuinely observant to just ditch the turban completely. I'm not suggesting ditching your dastaar. Hell no. Keep your crown! I'm just saying that having your head occasionally uncovered when you're resting, or just about to go to bed/to the shower shouldn't be a big deal. Your kesh is a beautiful thing. Nothing odd or unnatural about it. All I'm saying is it's no biggy if people see your kesh bro. Sure, people at first might be mesmerized simply because they've never seen such a thing before. Give it a few weeks/months it will be nothing. They've had got accustomed to it. I'm sure others would disagree but living with people and putting yourself under pressure to NEVER EVER be seen without your dastaar is only going to put unnecessary pressure on you, and you want to be able to chill where you rest dude. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vikrampreet Posted July 10, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 10, 2013 thanks, I really appreciate that. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.