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Camp Coffee


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Anyone who has grown up in an Indian household in Britain will be aware of the 'Coffee' ritual - you have unexpected guests ,at least 2 complete families, late in the evening - They expect to be fed and watered and sit up all night either gossiping or watching dodgy wedding videos usually from India - or (an increasingly rare occurrence ) wait for the menfolk to stumble back from the Pub. At some point the women folk will want a 'coffee' - this is not coffee as any normal person will recognise - but a huge pateela / vat of full fat milk ( if you're a Brummie that yucky sterilized stuff in a glass bottle with a metal cap - you know who you are !) with at least 2 bags of sugar , some Saunff and wait for it a tiny teaspoon of instant coffee ( well you wouldn't want Bunty and Bubloo to be up all night jumping on the sofa (actually Indians only have Bed settees- you know the ones - rock hard, with added storage that can be flipped into a double bed - to accommodate more guests ) - because of All the caffeine in one teaspoon of coffee in 15 pints of milk !

Anyway if you were posh ie. had an extension built on your garage which housed a 15 year old Merc - Then you used Camp Coffee -- Why? - because it had a Singh on the bottle - usually the only other Brown face you ever saw that didnt belong to your family !!

The Singh on the bottle was always a cause for concern in our house - why was a cavalry officer serving coffee to a British soldier in a kilt sat in a chair - where were the 'bearers' isn't that their job ? - was this just an example of the brits lording it over the darkies during the Raaj - or just our superior punjabi thinking - WE never did that sort of thing !

Anyway to cut a long story short I was in Sainsburys today and saw a bottle of Camp Coffee - I didn't think they made it anymore and Lo and behold they've changed the bottle - now the Singh and the Scot are both sitting down on chairs having a drink together !!

Is this a case of politcal correctness - re writing History - like getting rid of the Golly on Robertsons Jam ? or am I just bored and got way too much time on my hands - I 'll let you decide !!!

Before

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After

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is it nice? never tried it.

i like milky coffee though. and i am from birmingham (near uzbekistan).

and it is not rare for visitors to come stumbling back from pub with my dad and bro (with me as the driver). we may not have a 15yr old merc, but we do have a 10 yr old merc sprinter (van).

damn, i'm getting teary-eyed and nostalgic! *sniff*

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To be honest - it tastes awful ! - what the chefs on telly call an acquired taste !

Im glad to hear I'm not the only one who is the designated driver for the pub crawl !

I remember as a kid my whole family would head for the Midlands squashed into our Vauxhall Viva - on a Friday - for a weekend which involved running riot around Smethwick High Street (us Kids ) and a 3 day session usually in the Red Cow pub for the Men - My dad would then insist on driving us home (this is the 70s) claiming he 'drives better' when he's had a few glassies ! (read that as three quarters of a bottle of Vat 69 and 15 pints of bitter!) We would arrive home just in time to have a wash and go straight to school on Monday !- God only knows how we survived !!

Thankfully those days are over ( at least for my Dad) - I always find it funny when 'Uncles' at the gurdwara complain about the youth of today - I mean they lived through the swinging sixties - OK granted they had a hard life working in foundaries - living 20 to a house on Abbotts Rd Southall - but come off it I doubt all of them were 'angels'!

Anyway - before I get told off by the forum police - I'll shut up

One thing though when you're the designated driver Singh - you get to see and remember all the antics people get up to !

My wifes family are all geordies - so they are a good 5 hour drive away - when I get there I end up driving them all about - just what I need more driving ! - the only bonus is I get to tell them I remember when ***** fell on his arse while doing his 'Usher' Moves and how Uncle ***** nearly broke his leg dancing on one leg to Apna Punjab !!! - Plus all the Geordie accents get even more indecipherable the more they drink

I'll shut up now -

Disclaimer -- I am not glorifying drink - I just live in the Real world !!!

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