harsharan000

On Alcoholics Three men were drunk and they stopped a taxi.....the taxi driver figured that they were not in their right minds......so, he just switched on the engine and switched it off after a while and told them : "we have arrived"...... The first man gave him money..... the second one thanked him..... but the third one....he slapped the taxi driver..... The taxi driver was stunned because he was hoping that none of them must have realized that the car didn’t move an inch.. so, he asked the third man: "what was that for?" The third man replied: "control your speed next time you got here so quick you almost killed us....."

On punishments A Sardar, a German and a Pakistani got arrested consuming alcohol which is a severe offence in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime they are all sentenced 20 lashes each of the whip. As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheik announced: "It's my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping." The German was first in line; he thought for a while and then said: "Please tie a pillow to my back." This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes & the German had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain. The Pakistani was next up. After watching the German in horror he said smugly: "Please fix two pillows to my back." But even two pillows could only take 15 lashes & the Pakistani was also led away whimpering loudly. The Sardar was the last one up, but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said: "You are from a most beautiful part of the world and your culture is one of the finest in the world. For this, you may have two wishes!" "Thank you, your Most Royal and Merciful Highness," Sardar replied. "In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me not 20, but 100 lashes." "Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man, you are also very brave." The Sheikh said with an admiring look on his face. "If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it" And what is your second wish?" the Sheikh asked. Sardar smiled and said, "Tie the Pakistani to my back" !!! "SINGH IS KING"....."

On loot maar 2 Sardars bank lootne gaye, Par gun bhool gaye� Phir bhi bank loot liya Kaise??? . . . . . . . . . Bank Manager bhi sardar tha. Bola �I trust you, gun kal dikha dena� ============ � Santa ke pita USA se aaye. Pita: teri maa kahan hai? Santa: Woh toh marr gayee! Pita: Saale tune mujhe bataya q nahin? Santa : Maine socha aapko surprise dunga =================�� � Sardar: Raat bhar train mein neend hi nahin aayee, upar ka seat mila tha� Dost: Toh exchange kyun nahin kiya Sardar: Arrey bewakoof, kisse karta... neeche ke seat pe koi bhi nahin tha. � =================���� Sardarni: Lo, light chale gayee Sardar: Light chali gayee toh kya, fan chalu kar Sardarni: Lo, kee na wahi sardaron-waali baat, Agar fan chalu kiya toh mombatti bhuj nahin jayegi? =============���� �� � If sardar want to dial 9449494494, how will he dial........? .. .. ... .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ... .. He will first dial ..... 94494 and then press "REDIAL"..................... ================ �Sardar: Yeh kela (banana) kaisa diya? Shopkeeper:Ek Rupiya. Sardar: 60 Paisa ka deta hai? S.K: 60 paise mein to sirf chilka milega. Sardar: Ley 40 paisay, chilka rakh aur kela de de........ ================ One day a Sardarji was talking with his friend.... Santa:�I and my wife�have to learn Telugu within 6 months or we�will not be able to communicate with�our child. Friend: Is it?! Why? Santaji: We have adopted a Telugu child and it will start to speak after 6 months! ============= Santa: Parso meri biwi kuwey mein gir gayi, bahut chot lagi thi, bahut chilla rahi thi. .. Banta: Ab kaisi hai woh? .. Santa: Ab theek hi hogi -�kal se kuwey se aawaz nahi aa rahi hai.. � Cheers!

SAY YOUR PRAYERS ONLY IN ENGLISH In case of an emergency, speak only in English !! Never say prayers in any other language! U never know what kind of translation problem u can run into An Indian in the US suffered a heart attack on the road and was picked up by an ambulance. Being religious, he kept repeating - Hari Om, Hari Om, Hari Om. When the ambulance pulled into his home, his wife came out and screamed to the paramedics: 'Why didn't you take him straight to the hospital?' They replied "Because he kept saying, 'Hurry home Hurry home Hurry home!'

A fight between a wife and a husband... A husband frantically calls hotel management from his hotel room, "Please come fast I'm having an argument with my wife and she says she will jump out the window of your hotel". . The manager responded, "Sir that's a personal matter. . Husband: "The window won't open! That's a maintenance matter !"

Indian student in the USA It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said 'Give me Liberty , or give me Death'?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said. 'Very good!' Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?' Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863' said Chandrasekhar. The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.' She heard a loud whisper: 'Screw the Indians,' 'Who said that?' she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up. 'General Custer, 1862.' At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.' The teacher glares around and asks 'All right! Now, who said that?' Again, Chandrasekhar says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.' Now furious, another student yells, 'Oh yeah? Suck this!' Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, 'Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!' Now with almost mob hysteria someone said 'You little shit. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.' Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, ' Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004.' The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh shit, we're screwed!' And Chandrasekhar said quietly, 'I think it was the American people, November 4th, 2008".

Madrasi Jokes... What are the degrees of egoism in Tamil Nadu? I, Iyer, Iyengar. What’s the opposite of Gopalakrishnan? Comepalakrishnan. How do they start a road race in Tamil Nadu? Ready….Steady…..PO! What do you call a really colourful Tamilian? Rangamannar Rangarajan. How does a Tamilian introduce the tennis superstar Lendl? Ivan Lendl (Ivan = ‘he’ in Tamil). What did the Tamilian call the tall building a Japanese built? Nikumo Nikado (Will it or won't it stand?) What is the opposite of Subramniam Swamy? Subramaniam Didn’t See Me. A lady arrived at the Madras airport after spending 36 hours in transit. She was fully exhausted after such a long trip with her 6 young kids. Collecting many suitcases, the family entered the cramped customs area. A young customs official watched our entourage in disbelief, “Ma’am,” he said, “Do all these children and this luggage belong to you?” “Yes, sir,” the lady said with a sigh. “They're all mine.” The customs agent began his interrogation: “Ma'am, do you have any weapons, contraband or illegal drugs in your possession?” “Sir,” she calmly answered, “if I'd had any of those items, I would have used them by now.” James Bond comes out of British Airways at Chennai, goes to his waiting driver and says,“I’m Bond, James Bond. James to you”. For which the driver replies “I’m Subramaniam, Bala Subramaniam. Balls to you…”

Patni : Aasman Mein Taare Dekhte Huwe.. Bataiye Woh Kaunsi Cheez Hai Jo Aap Roz Dekh Sakhte Hain Par Ghar Laa Nahin Sakhte?" Pati : Main Nahin Bataunga...! Patni : Bolo Naa Please.. Pati : Padosan..! Bibi : Iss Hafte Hum Roz Cinema Dekhenge...Aagle Hafte Roz Shopping karenge.. Sohar : Uske Next Week Roz Mandir Jayenge.. Bibi : Wo kyu?? Sohar : Bheekh Mangne Ke Liye..! PAPPU NE BAHUT TAPASYA KI.. BHAGWAN KHUSH HUWE... Bhagwan : Pappu Beta, Kya Chahiye..? Papu : Ek Naukri, Badi Si Gaadi...Aur Dher Saari Ladkiyaan.. Bhagwan : " TATHAASTU " AAJ PAPPU GIRLS SCHOOL MEIN BUS DRIVER HAI..! Biwi : Kal Aapne Phir Apni Girlfriend Ke Saath Movie Dekhi..? Miya : Kya Karein Darling..Aaj Kal Ki Movies Family Ke Sath Dekhne Ke Qaabil Kahan Hain!! Biwi : Kya Baat Hai..Aaj Mere Photo Pe Photo Kheenche Ja Rahe Ho? Patti : Kuchh Nahin, Aaj Mere Sarr Pe Wild Life Photography Ka Bhoot Sawaar Hai! Pati : Bhagyavan...Kaha Ja Rahi Ho..? Patni : Aatm Hatya Karne..! Pati : To Itna Make-Up Kyun Kiya Hai..? Patni : Kal Subah Aakbar Mein Photo Nahi Aayega Kya ..! Do Terra Ke.."Aatma Haatya".. Paila : Jaaldi Aur Aacha.."Gale Mein Rassi Dal Kar Fan Par Latak Jao..!" Doosra : Aaista Aur Bayanak.."Gale Mein Varmala Daal Kar Zindagi Bhar Miya-Biwi Ban Kar Latke Raho..!! Bibi Aur Suraj Ek Jaisa Kyoon Hai..? DONO KI TARAF AAP AANKH UTHAA KAR NAHI DEKH SAKTE..! KISI SATPURSH NE KAHA HAI.. "SUKH" Aadmi Ko Utna Hi Milta Hai, Jitna Usne Punya Kiya Hoga...! Aur.... "SHANTI" Utni Hi Milegi Jitni Uski Biwi Ki Marzi Hogi...! Ek Pagal Ne Doosre Pagal Ki Jan Bachai.. Doctor Ne Usey Office Bulaya Aur Kaha.. Tumne Uss Pagal Ko Pani Ke Tub Se Nikal Kar Ye Sabit Kiya Ke Tum Normal Ho...Lekin Afsos Ke Aaj Subah Usne Rassi Se Latak Kar Phir Khudkushi Kar Lee. Pagal : Ha, Ha, Ha Woh To Meney Usey Sukhane Ke Leye Latkaya Tha..! Ladka : Hum Dono Kuchh Waqt Saath Reh Lete Hain..!.. Agar Vichar Mile To Shadi Kar Lenge... Aur Agar Koi Galti Hui To Alag Ho Jayenge." Ladki : Tab Galti Kis Ke Paas Rahegi.. ? PItta : Beta, Aaj Tak Tum Ne Koi Aisa Kaam Kiya Hai Jis Se Mera Sar Ooncha Ho? Beta : Han Pittaji, Ek Baar Aap Ke Sar Ke Neeche Takiya Lagaya Tha, kya Bhool Gaye..? Delhi Mein Ek Kutti Raat Ko Raaste Par Akeli Ja Rahi Thi... Raaste Mein 5/6 Kutte Mile... Kutti Ghabra Gai...... Kutto Ne Kaha... "Aap Aaram Se Jaiye Aur Dariye Nahin... Hum Kutte Hain Aadmi Nahin....! Chhotu : Swamiji, Aisi Patni Ko Kya Kahenge...Jo Gori Ho, Lambi Ho, Intelligent Ho, Badiya Looking Ho, Patti Ko Samjhe Aur Kabhi Jhagda Na Kare..? Swami : MANN KA WEHAM, BETA..!! Magician : I Will Now Cut This Man's Wife In Two.. Man : What Kind Of Magic Is Dis Bhai, Turning One Problem Into Two..! EK Aadmi Ne Mithai Ki Dukan Kholi... Bahar Ek Ishtihaar Lagaya... "Ek Naukar Ki Zaarurat Hai Jisko Diabetes Ho" VITAMINS IN APPLES..! Apple Se "Vitamins" Milti Hain, Vitamins Se "Power" Power Se "Work" Hota Hai, Work Se "Paise" Paise Se "Marriage" Hoti Hai, Aur Marriage Se "Wife" Milti Hai.. Wife Se "Tension" Bhi Milta Hai, Aur Tension Se "Depression". Depression Se "Death" Le Beta...Aur Khaa Apple..! Japan Main Do Dost They.... Ek Ka Naam Tha “Jo” Aur Dusrey Ka Naam Tha “Wo” Ek Din “Jo” Ke Pas "JIN" Aa Gaya.. “Jo” Ne Dar Kar “Wo” Ko Awaz Di... “Wo” Bhag Kar Aya... "JIN" Ko Dekh Kar “Wo” Ka Intqal Ho Gaya.. Bus Usi Din Se Hi Kehte Hein…“JO” DAR GAYA, “WO” MAR GAYA..! English And Hindi Always Contradict:- English : The Sooner The Better.. Hindi : Jaldi Ka Kaam Shaitaan Ka Hota Hai.. English : Think Of The Devil, And The Devil Is Here.. Hindi : Badi Lambi Umar Hai Tumhari, Abhi Tumhe Hi Yaad Kar Rahe Thei.. English : Dont Wait, Fight For Your Rights.. Hindi : Sabar Ka Fal Meetha Hota Hai. English : As Wise As An Owl.. Hindi : Ullu Ka Pattha! Gud Night!

WIFE KNOWS HOW TO SEND HER MAN TO PRISON!!! A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says,' I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.' The driver says, 'Gee, officer, I had it on cruise control at 60; perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating. ' Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: 'Now don't be silly, dear -- you know that this car doesn't have cruise control.' As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, 'Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once !! ?' The wife smiles demurely and says, 'Well dear you should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did or your speed would have been higher.' As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, 'Woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?' The officer frowns and says, 'And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine.' The driver says, 'Yeah, well, you see, officer, I had it on, but I took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket.' The wife says, 'Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving.' And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket, the driver turns to his wife and barks, 'WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??' The officer looks over at the woman and asks, 'Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?' (I love this part) 'Only when he's been drinking.!!

Israelis invented a machine that catches thieves; they took it out to different countries for a test. In U.S.A, in 30 minutes, it caught 30 thieves; In UK, in 30 minutes it caught 50 thieves; In Spain, in 30 minutes it caught 65 thieves; In Ghana, in 30 minutes it caught 600 thieves; In India, in 15 minutes the machine was stolen !!!!!!!!! (with Government connivance.)

"Two lions escape from a zoo. One of the lions had been captured from the jungle, so he runs back to the jungle. The other was born in the zoo itself - so is basically a city-slicker. He vanishes into the city. Three days later the jungle-lion is recaptured - and returned to the zoo. A month passes, then two, three..... but city-lion is not traceable! Finally, after six months the city-lion is also recaptured and brought back to the zoo. Jungle-lion is amazed to see his friend. Jungle-lion: For God's sake, how were you able to evade these guys for 6 whole months?! City-lion: Kuchh nahi yaar! I just went to a government department, and hid behind a huge pile of dusty files that they have there. Jungle-lion: But what did you eat there? City-lion: Arrey, there was an unlimited supply of government servants. Whenever I ate one, they hired five more. Nobody did any work anyway, so nobody missed the ones I ate. Jungle-lion: Wow! But, then how did you get caught? City-lion: Galti kar gaya yaar... On the last day I ate the chai-walla. Now, everyone missed their chai-walla for their chai! They launched a massive hunt. And I got caught

Co-pilot was welcoming the passengers on the plane shortly after take off. "Thank you for flying with us this morning. The weather is....." When suddenly he starts screaming while he is still on the loud speakers:" Oh my God. OMG! OMG! This is going to hurt....Its burning" A ghostly Silence reigned! He gets back on the microphone talking to the passengers: "I sincerely apologize for the incident but the air hostess just dropped a very hot cup of coffee on my lap...you should see my pants from the front" A passenger replies "Why don't you come here and see Our PANTS FROM BEHIND"!!

Pass the banana Bananas are very temperature sensitive when ripening. If they drop below 51F they can stay green with brown spots and are in fact ripe. To ripen green bananas over night place in a paper bag with an apple. Apples give off CO2 which hastens the ripening process. Didn't spend all that time on nana boats for nothing. A professor at CCNY for a physiological psych class told his class about bananas. He said the expression 'going bananas' is from the effects of bananas on the brain. Read on: Never, put your banana in the refrigerator!!! This is interesting. After reading this, you'll never look at a banana in the same way again. Bananas contain three natural sugars - sucrose, fructose and glucose combined with fibre. A banana gives an instant, sustained and substantial boost of energy. Research has proven that just two bananas provide enough energy for a strenuous 90-minute workout. No wonder the banana is the number one fruit with the world's leading athletes. But energy isn't the only way a banana can help us keep fit. It can also help overcome or prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a must to add to our daily diet. Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND amongst people suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating a banana. This is because bananas contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body converts into serotonin, known to make you relax, improve your mood and generally make you feel happier. PMS: Forget the pills - eat a banana. The vitamin B6 it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood. Anaemia : High in iron, bananas can stimulate the production of haemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anaemia. Blood Pressure: This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in potassium yet low in salt, making it perfect to beat blood pressure. So much so, the US Food and Drug Administration has just allowed the banana industry to make official claims for the fruit's ability to reduce the risk of blood pressure and stroke. Brain Power: 200 students at a Twickenham (Middlesex) school ( England ) were helped through their exams this year by eating bananas at breakfast, break, and lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the potassium-packed fruit can assist learning by making pupils more alert. Constipation: High in fibre, including bananas in the diet can help restore normal bowel action, helping to overcome the problem without resorting to laxatives. Hangovers: One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover is to make a banana milkshake, sweetened with honey.. The banana calms the stomach and, with the help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system. Heartburn: Bananas have a natural antacid effect in the body, so if you suffer from heartburn, try eating a banana for soothing relief. Morning Sickness: Snacking on bananas between meals helps to keep blood sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness. Mosquito bites: Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing the affected area with the inside of a banana skin. Many people find it amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation. Nerves: Bananas are high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system. Overweight and at work? Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austria found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate and chips.. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most obese were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs. The report concluded that, to avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need to control our blood sugar levels by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every two hours to keep levels steady. Ulcers: The banana is used as the dietary food against intestinal disorders because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit that can be eaten without distress in over-chronicler cases. It also neutralizes over-acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the stomach. Temperature control: Many other cultures see bananas as a 'cooling' fruit that can lower both the physical and emotional temperature of expectant mothers. In Thailand , for example, pregnant women eat bananas to ensure their baby is born with a cool temperature. Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD): Bananas can help SAD sufferers because they contain the natural mood Enhancer tryptophan. Smoking &Tobacco Use: Bananas can also help people trying to give up smoking. The B6, B12 they contain, as well as the potassium and magnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal. Stress: Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the heartbeat, sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body's water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, thereby reducing our potassium levels. These can be rebalanced with the help of a high-potassium banana snack. Strokes: According to research in The New England Journal of Medicine, eating bananas as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death by strokes by as much as 40%! Warts: Those keen on natural alternatives swear that if you want to kill off a wart, take a piece of banana skin and place it on the wart, with the yellow side out. Carefully hold the skin in place with a plaster or surgical tape! So, a banana really is a natural remedy for many ills. When you compare it to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrate, three times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitamins and minerals. It is also rich in potassium and is one of the best value foods around So maybe it's time to change that well-known phrase so that we say, 'A banana a day keeps the doctor away!'

A chat with Dr.Devi Shetty, Narayana Hrudayalaya (Heart Specialist) Bangalore was arranged by WIPRO for its employees. The transcript of the chat is given below. Useful for everyone. Qn: What are the thumb rules for a layman to take care of his heart? Ans: 1. Diet - Less of carbohydrate, more of protein, less oil 2. Exercise - Half an hour's walk, at least five days a week; avoid lifts and avoid sitting for a longtime 3. Quit smoking 4. Control weight 5. Control BP - Blood pressure and Sugar Qn: Is eating non-veg food (fish) good for the heart? Ans: No Qn: It's still a grave shock to hear that some apparently healthy person gets a cardiac arrest. How do we understand it in perspective? Ans: This is called silent attack; that is why we recommend everyone past the age of 30 to undergo routine health checkups. Qn: Are heart diseases hereditary? Ans: Yes Qn: What are the ways in which the heart is stressed? What practices do you suggest to de-stress? Ans: Change your attitude towards life. Do not look for perfection in everything in life. Qn: Is walking better than jogging or is more intensive exercise required to keep a healthy heart? Ans: Walking is better than jogging, since jogging leads to early fatigue and injury to joints Qn: You have done so much for the poor and needy. What has inspired you to do so? Ans: Mother Theresa, who was my patient. Qn: Can people with low blood pressure suffer heart diseases? Ans: Extremely rare. Qn: Does cholesterol accumulates right from an early age (I'm currently only 22) or do you have to worry about it only after you are above 30 years of age? Ans: Cholesterol accumulates from childhood. Qn: How do irregular eating habits affect the heart ? Ans: You tend to eat junk food when the habits are irregular and your body's enzyme release for digestion gets confused. Qn: How can I control cholesterol content without using medicines? Ans: Control diet, walk and eat walnut. Qn: Which is the best and worst food for the heart? Ans: Fruits and vegetables are the best and oil is the worst. Qn: Which oil is better - groundnut, sunflower, olive? Ans: All oils are bad. Qn: What is the routine checkup one should go through? Is there any specific test? Ans: Routine blood test to ensure sugar, cholesterol is ok. Check BP, Treadmill test after an echo. Qn: What are the first aid steps to be taken on a heart attack? Ans: Help the person into a sleeping position, place an aspirin tablet under the tongue with a sorbitrate tablet if available, and rush him to a coronary care unit, since the maximum casualty takes place within the first hour. Qn: How do you differentiate between pain caused by a heart attack and that caused due to gastric trouble? Ans: Extremely difficult without ECG. Qn: What is the main cause of a steep increase in heart problems amongst youngsters? I see people of about 30-40 yrs of age having heart attacks and serious heart problems. Ans: Increased awareness has increased incidents. Also, sedentary lifestyles, smoking, junk food, lack of exercise in a country where people are genetically three times more vulnerable for heart attacks than Europeans and Americans. Qn: Is it possible for a person to have BP outside the normal range of 120/80 and yet be perfectly healthy? Ans: Yes. Qn: Marriages within close relatives can lead to heart problems for the child. Is it true? Ans : Yes, co-sanguinity leads to congenital abnormalities and you may NOT have a software engineer as a child Qn: Many of us have an irregular daily routine and many a times we have to stay late nights in office. Does this affect our heart? What precautions would you recommend? Ans : When you are young, nature protects you against all these irregularities. However, as you grow older, respect the biological clock. Qn: Will taking anti-hypertensive drugs cause some other complications (short/long term)? Ans : Yes, most drugs have some side effects. However, modern anti-hypertensive drugs are extremely safe. Qn: Will consuming more coffee/tea lead to heart attacks? Ans : No. Qn: Are asthma patients more prone to heart disease? Ans : No. Qn: How would you define junk food? Ans : Fried food like Kentucky , McDonalds , Samosas, and even Masala Dosas. Qn: You mentioned that Indians are three times more vulnerable. What is the reason for this, as Europeans and Americans also eat a lot of junk food? Ans: Every race is vulnerable to some disease and unfortunately, Indians are vulnerable for the most expensive disease. Qn: Does consuming bananas help reduce hypertension? Ans: No. Qn: Can a person help himself during a heart attack (Because we see a lot of forwarded e-mails on this)? Ans: Yes. Lie down comfortably and put an aspirin tablet of any description under the tongue and ask someone to take you to the nearest coronary care unit without any delay and do not wait for the ambulance since most of the time, the ambulance does not turn up. Qn: Do, in any way, low white blood cells and low hemoglobin count lead to heart problems? Ans: No. But it is ideal to have normal hemoglobin level to increase your exercise capacity. Qn: Sometimes, due to the hectic schedule we are not able to exercise. So, does walking while doing daily chores at home or climbing the stairs in the house, work as a substitute for exercise? Ans : Certainly. Avoid sitting continuously for more than half an hour and even the act of getting out of the chair and going to another chair and sitting helps a lot. Qn: Is there a relation between heart problems and blood sugar? Ans: Yes. A strong relationship since diabetics are more vulnerable to heart attacks than non-diabetics. Qn: What are the things one needs to take care of after a heart operation? Ans : Diet, exercise, drugs on time , Control cholesterol, BP, weight. Qn: Are people working on night shifts more vulnerable to heart disease when compared to day shift workers? Ans : No. Qn: What are the modern anti-hypertensive drugs? Ans: There are hundreds of drugs and your doctor will chose the right combination for your problem, but my suggestion is to avoid the drugs and go for natural ways of controlling blood pressure by walk, diet to reduce weight and changing attitudes towards lifestyles. Qn: Does dispirin or similar headache pills increase the risk of heart attacks? Ans : No. Qn: Why is the rate of heart attacks more in men than in women? Ans: Nature protects women till the age of 45. (Present Global census show that the Percentage of heart disease in women has increased than in men ) Qn: How can one keep the heart in a good condition? Ans: Eat a healthy diet, avoid junk food, exercise everyday, do not smoke and, go for health checkups if you are past the age of 30 ( once in six months recommended) .... Please, don’t hoard knowledge. It takes sharing of knowledge to discover and understand the world in which we live.

From Veer Lucky´s post above, there is an inetersting parragraph, on which I would like to give a humble opinion: (I have been in this scenario many times!) But,...... Have to REMEMBER- that progress can't actually be assigned to devotion. Devotion is about submitting and surrendering and can't be measured by self.-ONLY HE can judge and measure.So how can we really feel if we are progressing or not ? And then, because we can get our heads wrapped around ''oh, we must hear this...or smell this... or see this.....'' we forget about what 'HIS GRACE" actually means.- Again, we put our selves into the play of kal, maya and self haumai. According to almost all Mahapurushs´and gyanis, the path of devotion is the easiest and fastest one, to realize that primal Truth(Aad Sach). "Gyan, dhyan, karam na jaana" ..... the lovers know only, how to love Him, otherwise they considere themselves moorakhs, in any other field... Devotion , is a game of love, between the lover sikh, and the beloved, Akal Purukh. And the price which one which has to pay, is giving away his head, to his Preetam, means no haume, no ego, no mind....only then can one walk on the thin lane of Prem Bhakti. The devotee, the bhagat, the sikh, is so much in love with Him, that he can not live even a moment without the beloved, without His Darshan... it is like a fish out of the water. That sikh, is in a state of pain always, but not physical pain, but the one in his heart, because he can not tolerate even a moment away from his Preetam...days and nights does he go sleepless and restless... And that is because he has given away his mind, heart and body away to His Beloved. He does not care, how or what the world is....he has left himself in His Mauj, His will, like a baby, in the arms of his mother. For the world he may seem insane, but in reality he is in a higher avastha or state. In this state, the lover does not calculate, nor does he measure, anything like we ordinary mortals, by looking towards any expected results. For him, only being in the presence of Him, is the only thing that soothes his pains. For him , either he is with his beloved, or is away. The best example we have of this is, when Guru arjun Dev Maharaj was sent away by His Father to attend a relative´s wedding...we can all benefit from the waves of real love and bhireh found in it, either by reading or listening it, through the many kathars, may they be online, or in the Gurdawaras...."Hau reh na sakah bin dekhe Preetama"....Mohe rehan na aaveh, neend na aaveh ....hau golee jiu gol gumaee... My God, atee sunder Bani... The sikh knows(the devotees of the Lord are wise), that his Beloved, can not be found anywhere outside, but within him according to Gurmat. So for that reason, he turns away from maya and the world, by withdrawing his attention and focus from the world and concentrates alone on Him, and that is Nam Simran, because if anything is going to bring him closer to his Beloved, he knows, it is His Simran. On the other side, when the Beloved sees that His sikh has turned his face from the world, while living in it, and has become a gurmukh by turning his face towards Him within, then, He showers His grace on that sikh, and nourishes him, with the Amrit of His Nam. Not only that, but keeps up His promise, given in the Bani: Jin Har jaapiya, se Har hoeeyaa. He merges that drop of His soul, in Himself,the Ocean. Thus the drop has long time ago shedded its haume, its ego, through devotion, so that Sachay Patshah, could one day bless him with His darshan, and makes him one with Himself, in His Shabad roop. The devotee knows nothing else, but only, that He is the only truth, and also the objective of my life. And only through love can I be with Him. That is why it is said: Sahib ke Darbar maein, kewal bhakti aur pyar... Aur kewal bhakti aur pyar maein Sahib razee... Jin prem kiyoh, tinhee Prabh paayoh

Veer Jee, it is true, what you have said, that previous lives karmas are destroyed by coming closer to God. But doesn´t the Bani of our Guru Sahibans say the same: Prabh ka Simran, garbh na baseh. Har Simran me Prabh aap Nirankara. It clearly tells us, that because of His Simran, all your previous lives karmas are destroyed or burnt, so naturally if there are no karmas left, there is no birth nor death. And so, how do we come closer to Him? Of course, by the only means of His Dhyan or Simran. Pure mathematic logic...that is Gurmat.

Dear Pal, your question araised, as per what stage did we come under the effect of maya and it laws... I would say, it started below the stage or region of Parbraham, which is Braham...it is there that the soul gets its first covering of causal body in Trikuti, and is knotted together with mind; and Maya spreads her tentacles from there onwards to the subsequent lower planes; in this region is the store house of all our karmas. Then comes the thousand petalled region or the astral region, the region of devis, devtas, angels, ... and when the soul passes through it, again it is covered with an astral body...then going still lower, when it takes birth on this gross plane, it gets another covering more on it, with the physicall bodies... This was the description of the spiritual planes from Braham downwards, where maya, mind and karmas start their games...and from there on, the lower the plane, the stronger their effects. Now above Braham, first is Parbraham, then Sunn, and then the purest region of permanent bliss, Sach Khand, where Satnam has His abode. All parlay or mahaparlays ocurr up to the skirts of Sunn only. That is why, Gurmukhs, stress only on Nam, because it is only by our attachment with Nam through its Simran, that we cross each and every stage, up to Sach Khand. We may ask, why only Nam alone can do so? Because that Nam, as the Bani says: is the Shabad Guru , and the dhun chela, is our soul. That Shabad is the Aad Guru, or Nirankar, or Wahiguru, which is the Supreme Power, and then when one is under the Sharan, the company of such a Gurudev, who dares to stop and question us? That is why, if we watch carefully the Bani, we shall see only mahima of Satpurukh and His Nam or Shabad, which is the only permanent and eternal reality. Attachment to the perishable, drags us into the wheel of the eigthty four... and attachment to the eternal alone, which is Nam, attracts us, and pulls us towards the region of purity, truth and eternal bliss. Wah wah Sachay Badshah.

Dear Das, I will not talk about the beginning, but I am going to mention about our present condition. And our present condition is such, that we, our souls are knotted together with mind, and so, whatever karma mind creates, in which ever way, soul as being knotted with the mind, suffers nad wanders in the wheel of eithty four . Why did the Creator created this creation, this only He can answer, for that we have to go or arise ourselves to where He is, otherwise we are so limited, that even if He comes and makes us understand, we shall not be able. This creation is imperfect, means transient and perishable, and if it has to gon on running, karmas, mind, pain and suffering have to be here, otherwise who would like to go back to Sach Khand...naturally nobody. So many Gurmukhs, have come already...but they did not come to make this place a comfortable place to stay forever, but they came always to remind us that this place is not your true Home, your Father Akal purukh is awaiting for you, ride in the Boat of Nam, and let us go back. But we do not pay attention to their words, rather we complicate things more and make our own rituals, comitees, rules, regulations,and thus make a stonger bond with this mayavee creation... so then let us think, how can we then ever free ourselves? We know mind is now controlling the soul, it runs after pleasures and commits sins, this is the trap of Kal Purukh to keep his creation going on, he can not create souls, he wants his creation to go on and be populated, he does not want any soul to think about Wahiguru..so he has kept all these traps at each step for the soul: mind, maya, paanch veekar, karmas, bodies ...attachments of land, religion family and an endless list .....etc Thanks to His Bani, we know that the only way to wash and defeat the mind is through Nam Simran, as it says: Prabha ke Simran, maan kee mael jae. The meditation on Nam, washes away all our sins. Shabad, karam kee, lekh katave , Shabad or Nam Simran, cuts the all karmas from the roots... so if there are no roots, there shall be no trees(lives, joonees), branches(bodies) and fruits(karmas) This is the only way, but we moorakhs we think we are wise, so we do jap, tap, poojas, paaths, murtee poojas, pilgrimages, bathes at so called holy places and many other nonsense...so let us ask ourselves, are we not foolish? We do not act as per the instructions of the Bani, but do all other things ...then we fight and kill in the name my religion, my land, my this , my that .... all rubbish. Wahiguru is not a monopoly of any so called religion, He belongs to all, but is reached only, by those who walk as per the Bani. And the Bani says: 1) Ik Oankar, Satgur Prasad 2) Jin Har japeeya, se Har hoeeya and thirdly 3) Se simraeh, jin Aap simraye This is Gurmat, as simple as that. What, why or where is the need to complicate it, to the extent that we miss the goal, the objective of our life from our view, which is none other than Akal Purukh?

In accordance to this present topic, Sree Guru Angad Dev Maharaj, enlightens us, with these His following beautiful and ambrosial words: Akhi bajoh vekhna, vin kanna sunana, Paira bajoh chalna, vin hatha karna; Jibhai bajoh bolna, iyo jivat marna, Nanak hukam pachhan kai, tau khasmal milna. He says that: To see without eyes, and to hear without ears, To walk without feet, and to work without hands; To talk without the tongue, this dying while living, By knowing His command, O Nanak, does the man find the Lord. Though the words are simple and clear, but they carry a deep spiritual message, which if followed, can give us the redemption from this Bhavsagar. His words as usual in the words of any Gurmukh, points out the ultimate Reality, which is Wahiguru, and not only that, but also the way to unite ourselves with that ultimate Reality. He is cleary pointing towards the practice of Nam Simran. He says that when you do the kamaee of Nam, through its Simran, you enter into a state of a higher level of Consciousness. Once there, you see without eyes, means the inner Jot or Light can be seen without these our physical eyes; we can hear the inner Shabad, without these our physical ears. We can walk without feet, means we travel in the Boat of Nam, we work without hands, means, there we we do the real seva, the seva of Akal Purukh, which is real devotion done without the need of hands, as we do not need any rituals or dogmas there, which are limited to this planet earth. Then He says: we talk without the tongue, because we talk with the tongue of our mind, which is engaged in His Simran. And anyone having put into practice or action this jugtee of devtion, is as good as dead to the world, because he is has now begun to live and stay in those higher planes of Consciousness(more often in a state of samadhi). And so in the end He says, by knowing and practicing this only real devotion which Wahiguru accepts from us as the only valid one, O Nanak, one thus realizes Him within himself, and frees himself from the cycle of birth and death. Wahiguru is unfathoamble, and that He knows, that´s why nobody can reach Him, without His assistance. All other methods apart from Nam Simran(Gurmat),are man made, are "mannmat", so naturally we by ourselves, by our own "chaturaee" can never ever reach Him, that is why, through Gurbani, through Gurmat, His path, we can reach and merge in Him. This is His wadeeayee, His mahanta .... Wah wah Sachay Badshah. P.S: Dear all, I am really greatful to all of you, for your warm welcome. But the fact is when I look at all of you, through your veechar, your posts, I find myself quite low... and this is true, no fake humility, whatever I say or write is nothing of my own, but it is His mahima. So actulally our attention should be on the kirtan/Bani, not on the loudspeaker. Our attention sholud be on His Majesty, Akal Purukh, not on the slave. He is the Reality, the Truth. There are real gems on this website, so good heartened, so faithful, so sincere... Rather, I would thank you all, for allowing me to learn and grow spiritually in your company,and overall by His Grace.

Very well stated by Veer Singh and Veer Lucky, In the tuk of Kabir Sahib, the message He wants to convey us, is, that everybody has a natural death, but we can learn to die in a manner, that we may not have to be born again. We may ask, what is that. Well according to these Gurmukhs, when we do Nam Simran or Abhyaas, our attention is focused within ourselves, on the reality of Shabad or Nam. For that time being, we may appear as dead to the world, as all our senses and physicall activity is stopped for that time being. Our eyes are closed as we see the inner light, our ears do not hear the world, as the attention is after the inner Divine Melody, we do not walk nor do we eat or do anything else.... In that sense, we are dead to the world...we have withdrawn our attention and focused it within, the mind is engaged in Simran also. This rehearsal of dying daily, means daily practice, or Kamaee of Nam, helps us to overcome the fear of death gradually...so that when we have to leave this world at our appointed time, we go fearless, and without any pain or trauma...morover, with Nam Abyaas, we shall come to know the exact time, we shall have to leave this world, before the real death takes place ... we can check so with the lives of Gurmukhs...not that all of them go on revealing these realities, but somehow, sometimes, out of their mauj, they give some hints. That is also what the Bani says: Prabh ke Simran, garbh na baseh. It is the same as what Kabir Sahib states above, but just with different words. So we see. Gurmukhs can be of different places and times, but their essence of teachings, are same....all of them stress only on the ultimate reality, which is Nam, and merging in that Nam, with the jugtee of, its Simran. P:S: all our relations are karmic, and limited within the spheres of mind. Once the soul, discards its coverings, bodies: gross, astral and causal, and the bondage with the mind is broken with the help of Nam, and becomes pure soul alone, it just wants to go back at its Nijh Ghar Sach Khand, as soon as possible.

Dear Singh Jee, whatever you have commented about your feelings...do not worry about them, they are nothing, but just natural human feelings. We are not made of stone or iron, but of flesh, bones and blood, and we have been given a big heart, to love our near and dear ones, and above all, the giver of all the unvaluable blessings we have received, who is none other than Wahiguru Akal Purukh. Whatever you have written, is just what it goes through, each and every being as a parent. The same goes with me. Just as you said, me too. today evening while returning from work, I was remebering my son...thinking that one day I shall not be here anymore ...then I was thinking, I will miss hugging him and kissing him, and believe me, as a parent to go through that feeling, is very painful. I love children, but my own one is dearest to me...children are gifts from Him to us parents, if viewed in the correct sense. The feeling one gets, by hugging and kissing one´s child...sorry to say, not even one´s spouse is comparable...that feeling is something different...I would say of a different world...even watchig him doing anything is a lovely scene. And I thank the Lord, by giving me such a lovely and a adorable child. He is almost a man now, but for me he is the same little child I used to hold in my arms when smaller. I often repeat teasing him, by telling him... you are so sweet, that even if all the skies were full of sweets or chocolates...even then, you are sweeter than all that. And then, he turns around and tells me, no no, not me but you are sweeter ...and this is how we have been keeping our relation,as friends...we are more friends than a father and a son...though the respect is there Nature has given us these instincts, of being protective, lovers and caretakers of our children..we are helpless. Once somebody was asking a Mahapurush, that he was so busy in his daily chorus of work, family and other occupations, that he was sorry, but did not find time to do abhyaas...So the Mahapurush told him...that, not because of our temporary worldly relations we should forget our heavenly Father, who is waiting since a long long time, since ages, for (we)His child, to return back to Him. We have some duties towards Him also. (these are not the exactly words, but the idea behind it, should be kept in view). The fear and sadness you mention, and we not being on a higher level, is also verily true with almost all of us. But with patience and constant efforts, we can overcome this stage. As the Bani says, meditate on the fearless(Nirbhav, Nirankar Akal Purukh), and you too shall become fearless. Do we know why will it be so? Because then, by His Simran, we shall turn from limited to unlimited like Him...with all His wisdom, with all His maturity, with all His majesty...so naturally we shall not miss anything. Though frankly speaking, as a limited being at my present stage...sometimes I have thought and prayed Him, dear Wahiguru, in all those big universes and skies...don´t you ever feel lonely .... If ever you feel so, do come to me, I will take care of you, give You company, and love You, and give You such big hugs and kisses, that I will make you enter my heart and keep you thight there for me alone.. Then I laugh at myself and say, how can you think so of Him, as per human terms ... the thing is, He wants to turn us, from limited to unlimited like Him, while we want to make Him, from unlimited to limited ... like us. Wah wah sachay Badshah

Since today, it seems to work fine, just as before. Thanks.

Dear Lucky, we should up keep our efforts always, and be alert like soldiers on the invisible mischiefs, the mind can play and cheat us. The mind is a very obedient and faithful servant of his master Kal Purukh, by keeping us distracted here, so that we may never ever think even by mistake of Akal Purukh. And since we stepped in this creation, we have been slaves of this very mind, to the extent that most of us do not distinguish our true nature as souls, and act as we are mind alone. It is in the holy company of Gurmukhs, Sadh and Sant Janas, that we come to be conscious of our true nature, as souls, only then we take the correct steps to move towards our Father´s House, Sach Khand. Bani is there, but let us be honest, how many of us practice what the Bani says? I would say, one in a million, or even half in a millon... It is by good luck, being a wadbhagee, a blessing from Wahiguru, that one gets the Sadh Sangat. Most of us take the Bani as theory, we just look to it superficially...nobody bothers to take out the gems from it, and thus straighten and enrich their paupper lives. Just by reading, doing pujas, paaths, fastings and pilgrimages...we think we have accomplished sikhi. But that is not Gurmat. We, like other religions, have turned our attention outwards. And the teachings of our Guru Sahibans, have been limited between the four walls of our narrow minds. So the essence, the real "anmol khazana of Nam" which is within each and everyone of us, we do not derive any benefits from it, thus waste our precious lives, running after shadows and go empty handed. The mind which you have mentioned, is no small thing. It has formed the habit of running out since aeons, so naturally it does not want to be quiet within..it is always running and seeking pleasures .... and also craving for desires to be fulfilled.... If one or two desires have been fulfilled from already its long list...it is again creating many many more...and so this cycle goes on, so ultimately we souls, are the loosers. Keeping in mind, these cravings for pleasures, Gurmukhs tell us the secret, to overpower and defeat the mind. They tell us, to make this mind taste the Amrit of Nam, and then it will be so absorbed and blissfull by this savoury, that it will stop running outwards and downwards. Then it will be our friend, and instead of running after the insipid tastes of the poisnous pleasures, it will want to have only this real taste of Nam. The Bani says: Prabh Ka Simran, maan kee mal jae. The abhyaas of Nam Simran, will wash away the impurities of the mind, making it inmaculate. By the holy practice of Nam Simran, we defeat the mind. The mind comes to rest peacefully at its origin which is Trikuti, and then the soul is liberated from its clutches, and also the coverings of astral and causal bodies, thus crosses Parbraham....and proceeds forward towards Sach Khand without the obstacles of mind and maya, which are left behind in Trikuti, the skirts of Braham. From Parbraham onwards, the Gurmukh reveals His real swaroop as Shabd Guru, to His sikh, His chela, our soul, and guides him, with His power and Jot, up to the very Sach Khand. This has to be so, as per the Bani of our Guru Sahibans. That is why it says: Sant sung, Prabh anter deetha.Or do we think, that by our "chaturaee", we can get hold of Him, He who is Nirankar? Lucky, your case is a little bit unusual. Because your experiences are due to your "kamaee" of past birth/s. It is not normal to achieve these experiences in that short time. You are resuming from where you left previously. You are not starting from zero. Usually it takes a lifetime or more to achieve what you are going recently. It is also a sign of His unlimited Daya Meher on you, so I will only advise you, do not ever leave your spiritual practices under any circumstances, and if possoble increase them more... you will be amazed with what you will get, it can not be described in words ...it is beyond imagination. Thank Him constantly for His grace, in the form of abhyaas...this is only, what He expects from us.

Dear brother Sat, thank you,it makes me inmensely happy, when I see, that by singing His mahima, His Glory...there is somewhere, some soul, which has felt the shower of His grace, by being receptive to it. We are all His children, and as such, the least we can do, is sing His glory, and thus purify our tongues; our ears by listening His Bani or kirtan; our hands and feet by doing some seva, and mostly our minds, by having Him constantly in our "chit" . Wah wah Sachay Patshah.

It is true, though it is a piece of art, and very nice, but takes a lot of time in loading ...sometimes it gets blocked. I have tried it with Firefox and with Google Chrome on Windows