lostsikh

Bro thanks for the link 
You are right i will look into it. Also i don't have a good relationship with my disfunctional family. I also get angry quite quickly as well. It is like i am meant to be felt like i have no voice. Or that my views are not valued. I give a example i have a few people i really don't get along with at all believe me via family. 
 
Everytime i see one of them or vists at home. I expected to behave in a very friendly way even though after he or she has left my parents make big talks oh he said this she said that. 
 
And if i don't talk in their way i get curcifed as soon as the person has left. 
 
For these reasons i get angry and my mum is the worest one it is like she makes herself a victim in all of this. She makes my life hell over these people saying oh you don't know when we might need somebody. I believe in Waheguru alone.
 
These circle of abuse from home has made me view girls as escorts. Like when going for aranged marriage a boy is asked his wages job education etc. This nasty views by families have created this idea or thought about escorts. 
I have been through a horrible childhood at school and watched abuse at home. 
 
Everytime i would make a mistake as all kids would do. I would be given hell. Mum always says "if you are wrong i will not take your side." "I don't want to make you a theif criminal"
 
This has made me feel horrible as i have seen kids and family members who despite being wrong, their mum and dad don't say nothing. 
 
This has created more hate inside me and towards people i don't get along with. And nowdays it is soo much tension at home and i stay away from they in my room whenever my parents are at home. 

Bro i live in the Uk. You are right i will try to read more gurbani, listen to katha etc. I will also try to find good sangat. 
 
Its just that i have no friends at all. I have been a lonley person since last 13 years. I have no social life. I never go out to clubs pubs etc. 
 
At the local gurdwara i have always get annoyed cos the ladies or sewadar make unpleasent comments and i don't like going there cos of it. 
 
I mean these lustful thoughts come and go and they don't distrub me 24/7. 
 
Luckly i keep my full kes bread and don't eat meat or alchool. 
I do try to do paath but i get critised for it as my mum sister say it is making me more angry hate filled egostic etc.

Bro thanks for the link 
You are right i will look into it. Also i don't have a good relationship with my disfunctional family. I also get angry quite quickly as well. It is like i am meant to be felt like i have no voice. Or that my views are not valued. I give a example i have a few people i really don't get along with at all believe me via family. 
 
Everytime i see one of them or vists at home. I expected to behave in a very friendly way even though after he or she has left my parents make big talks oh he said this she said that. 
 
And if i don't talk in their way i get curcifed as soon as the person has left. 
 
For these reasons i get angry and my mum is the worest one it is like she makes herself a victim in all of this. She makes my life hell over these people saying oh you don't know when we might need somebody. I believe in Waheguru alone.
 
These circle of abuse from home has made me view girls as escorts. Like when going for aranged marriage a boy is asked his wages job education etc. This nasty views by families have created this idea or thought about escorts. 
I have been through a horrible childhood at school and watched abuse at home. 
 
Everytime i would make a mistake as all kids would do. I would be given hell. Mum always says "if you are wrong i will not take your side." "I don't want to make you a theif criminal"
 
This has made me feel horrible as i have seen kids and family members who despite being wrong, their mum and dad don't say nothing. 
 
This has created more hate inside me and towards people i don't get along with. And nowdays it is soo much tension at home and i stay away from they in my room whenever my parents are at home. 

Veer ji i am glad you have watched this movie as it has many deep messages although it is not a suitable family movie it was very controversal when released as the censor board wanted to ban it. 
 
Anyway i am glad you have watched it and have learned a lesson never to fall in lust,anger,greed,ego and worldy attachments. 
 
You say compared to other posts i mentioned this movie why ?
Cos a friend of mine said its a very good movie of course i have never heard of it back then as i heard of other good hindi movies mentioned by him like Khiladi,Dacait,Krodhi,Ghayal,Mohra,Sadak,Shakti, Hukmat etc to watch. He mentioned this movie Red Rose saying it was a very good, so when i watched it was a completely different type of movie to be made in bollywood as compared to the other movies mentioned. 
 
Although Das has cut down a lot on movies,tv serials it was a few years ago as i wanted to a watch a movie.
 
So anyway as Das had read quite a few of the Chirtars from Chirtarpikayan the stories from it made more sense as this movie showed and displayed it in many of the key moments. 
 
So i am glad you have watched it and it should lead to a new direction.

Bro thanks a lot out of all the movies i have seen they have made me more lustful with songs and on screen kaam.
However as you judging by your posts seem a highly religious person gave a recommendation of this movie i thought lets watch it. 
 
As i have just watched it without spoiling the great movie. It showed me never to fall in love with anyone as kaam is a hell and worse the movie as a anti love story rather than promoting love stories. 
 
Although it is quite ahead and unsuitable for a family film it hits hard the message.
 
The way it is made has showed me never to ever look at a girl ever again in a lustful way. 
 
Bro you have opened my eyes with this movie. From now if i love the main character from the movie i will never desire love from lust kaam but from Waheguru.
 
Thanks from the bottom pits of my heart. I will aslo try to read the chirtars you have posted when i get a chance.  

Veer this is going to far now. I normally don't write about these things but as i have read these posts all i can say read Charitropakhyan in english. I know i shouldn't say this but i watched a bollywood movie a while back which is not suitable for a family film. It has similar themes to this bani like characters wise. I watched it after reading the charitars and i was shocked and made me believe the writtings even more. This is not suitable for everyone so caution is adviced. Watch the movie and i hope it will show what happens when you have finished the movie or anyone here who is struggling with kaam. If anyone has watched the movie please share your views on it as we need to help our lost brother from a paap.
 http://m.imdb.com/title/tt0156014/
 
http://sridasamgranth.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/charitropakhyan.html?m=1
 
https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=http://www.globalsikhstudies.net/pdf/Chritro%20pakhyaan%20Vol%20II.pdf&ved=0ahUKEwiDltWL_-nXAhVDyRQKHa67CEM4HhAWCDMwBg&usg=AOvVaw1n6LUE0IHZ-b8kH7GNPG1m
 
 

@lostsikh - Hope you read the experience shared by the brother below. If not, please read.
 
Bhul chuk maaf

Thank God this is just thoughts at the moment and nothing partical has been done. It is really scary listening to this.

@lostsikh - In addition to other diseases, you can also contract Hepatitis via sexual activities.
 
Bhul chuk maaf

Listen at 6:45 
 

In the clip below, Sant jee briefly explains the maryada and the Gurbanis to be read after the death of a person. If followed correctly, this will be of great assistance to the departed soul.
 
Bhul chuk maaf

Excellent find veer ji. Here is a another one by Bhai Randhir Singh in his book Undittha duniya and i did send it you.
 

Veer ji here is Sant Jarnail Singh Ji's version 
https://m.soundcloud.com/gurmat-parchar/bhaimardanapastlife

Veer this is the only version i have found so far online of this shabad. 
 
But here is a version i have tried making using roman 
 
AKHI GHATTA MUH VICH DATTA|| 
Bole na sake 
BIR BIR TAKKE  HARGOBIND DE DHAKKe MARYA  sri GURU HAR RAI sahib  ji DA dushman de sir bate  Sadka babbe nanak da

Here it is metioned in katha listen at 32:55
 

Control yourself man. This pleasure will only last for a few minutes. For a few minutes, you want to betray the Almighty Waheguru for it.
When you feel that the urges are very strong, go out for a jog or start boxing with a punching bag.
Have you thought of getting married?
 
Bhul chuk maaf

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Bro you are right i will try to listen to more katha and try a different Gurdwara for good sangat

Veer Ji listen to this katha at 50:00
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=1595912053802642&id=165458433514685
And do jaap of this shabad
https://www.searchgurbani.com/guru-granth-sahib/ang/14/print-view

Also bro, sexual lust is very harmful for your physical body itself. Semen is a very vital fluid for the body and it's retention has many great benefits. When you ejaculate, vital nutrients and energy gets sucked out of your body. For more details, please have a look below.
https://guardyoureyes.com/articles/tips-suggestions/item/the-benefits-of-sperm-retentionnofap
 
Gurparsaad, Daas is single.
 
Bhul chuk maaf

Bro thanks for replying i am very grateful. I will try to do these step by step. I have never done Amritvela ever in my life. I usually just my nitnem whenever i feel like it. 
 
Also if you don't mind me asking are you single or married ? 
 
These tips given by you are amazing compared to just thinking about sex all the time and dealing with. Like you said Ardas is the best key for it

Try to follow these tips (from another topic) below. They might help you.
First and Foremost - Keep doing Ardas infront of Maharaaj to assist you in fighting this demon (lust). Keep your mind occupied with resourceful activities. In your case, focus hard on your career growth. Diet control - Avoid spicy food, Garlic, eating from outside, etc. Before you go to sleep, recite Sri Kirtan Sohela Sahib jee 5 times, instead of one. Do jaap of Rakheya day shabad. This won't take much time Keep playing Gurbani on an audio player, while you are asleep When you wake up, immediately start doing jaap of Mool Mantar or any Shabad you like. Keep the mala/counter nearby. Engage in plenty of physical workout in a day Maintain a routine in your day, i.e sleeping/waking up at approximately the same time daily, etc Don't oversleep  Shower (including kesh) twice daily with cool water Wash your hands, feet and face with cold water, when sexual thoughts attack or take a cool shower. Start listening to Katha and Kirtan, when sexual thoughts attack. For most people, one can concentrate in them better than Naam Simran/Nitnem Try to wake up and meditate at Amritvela Start playing a game or watching a documentary/reading a book or engage in any other activity, which can assist you in diverting your mind away from sexual thoughts Avoid caffeinated drinks as much as possible. Caffeine affects sleeping patterns, which gives Lust an opportunity to attack. When a person is fully awake, then it is much easier to fight with Lust (and other vikars), as compared to when he is in a semi-awake condition (NREM sleeping stage). Maintain healthy eating habits, so that you avoid having any episodes of diarrhea or constipation. Lust can possibly attack the mind in these conditions too.  
Bhul chuk maaf

Gurparsaad, Daas will post more specific ways to fight lust later, but IMHO, you should not talk about this issue with anyone except Rehatvaan Gursikhs or Saints. Some people might spread that information, which will further lead to more embarrassment.
For you, talking to Rehatvaan Gurmukhs/Sants has two advantages:
First, they are in position to help you with your problem Next, they will keep your problem confidential  
Bhul chuk maaf

Welcome to the forum brother. It is good that you have talked about your problems here, which indicates that you have a deep desire to fight this vice.
Let's address the most critical aspect of your post. Apologize for being rude in advance.
Do you know that some escorts also work in the porn industry? Do you want to get infected with some STD (Sexaully Transmitted Disease)? It is possible that the escort (which you choose) could be infected with AIDS. Do you want to get yourself killed with such humiliation? Therefore, bro, I would request you drop the above idea from your mind, immediately and permanently. Don’t end up doing something foolish, for which you will regret the rest of your life. You are not a teen anymore. You should have some self-control in your life.
 
Bhul chuk maaf