Blog: Vegruary- A month of vegetarianism

[samurai]

2 hours ago, dalsingh101 said:

You know when you told me about you cuz's chacha and how he used to go on, I thought about my mate who passed away. Towards the end he was going off the rails, that's why we stopped talking. My nephew said something to me the other week that made me think about it. 

Waheguru sometimes gives long life to an oppressive evil person (like Aurengzaab) in their divine wisdom, but sometimes (this is what nephew said), he pulls people's files early, so they don't do even more messed up stuff and ruin even more lives?

When i was at funeral, i kept thinking the same thing. I think maharaj took him away to pull him out of his misery as he was stuck in this cycle and there seemed no way of getting out of it. the pain his mrs had to go through, him coming home drunk and beating her, plus hes a very big lad and even his slap is like a hammer punch. Plus she was from india and didnt say nothing, his other two wives were from here so didnt stay put with it.. So i agree with your nephew as sometimes maharaj pulls the plug early as he is the most mercifull.

This is why i am not a big fan of alcohol, ive seen too many houses break over it. Also this guy wasn't a working class shrabi but was a professional on a very good salary. The other thing i was thinking was that he had 2 older brothers who passed away at similar age as him and his mum is still alive, what karam for a mother to see the death of her 3 sons.  its mad, but does make you think..

 

 

 

[dalsingh101]

Quote

I think its ok for men to shed a tear (even in front of others), but not cry like a baby in front of others, leave that for behind closed doors..lol

I agree with you. Unfortunately when my friend passed, we hadn't been talking for a few years and my last words to him were harsh (but necessary). So fast forward a few years, and I had a bunch of crap I was dealing with when I got a text saying he'd passed. I didn't believe it at first, then I got confirmation from his fam. I ain't going to lie - it proper shocked me. I was all over the place. 

What I realise now is that I was in some sort of denial about it too. Because up until I went to the Gurdwara to see him, it felt like he was still alive for some reason. Then, when I saw him in the coffin - it cracked me up. It was the shock and the fact that we broke up badly. He was like a brother to me. My emotions were all over the place about it for a good while. I think I'm just getting to terms with it now.  

 

F**k it, you live and you learn. 

 

[dalsingh101]

PS - I noticed that today's training was a bit more like it used to be before I did the new diet. 

 

Oh yeah!

[samurai]

i think when you see the dead body 'reality' kicks in. Everyone reacts differently. Moving on is the hardest thing to do but the best/healthiest thing to do. The way i see things is that if the past is positive then its good to reminisce but if its negative/painfull don't bother dwelling on it, let it go and move on.

48 minutes ago, dalsingh101 said:

 

PS - I noticed that today's training was a bit more like it used to be before I did the new diet. 

 

haha,...that's the first thing i noticed, its a game changer..lol

[GurpreetKaur]

6 hours ago, Gunahgar said:

IMO, Women are emotional creatures. It is healthy for them if they can act out their emotions through excessive crying and shrieking. I am not in favor of beating chests though. Making sounds and noises is a great way to release the pent-up emotions inside whether its anger, fear or sorrow. When we lift heavy weight, we struggle and it can help if we can grunt or make some noise. Its a psychological effect. Also, if you go on roller-coaster rides, it makes the ride go easier. Similarly, its better to release these emotions through crying and making noises. However, it is also true that some people do put on a show even if they are not feeling anything. I guess, its like a camaraderie for their fellow women.

imo, For men, however, crying should not be done in public.  It should be done under closed doors or only with very close male members. Public display can have deep unconscious damage on others. Men need to be rock in these situations.

Kids are the least affected, however. Their healing process is very very fast.

As you grow older, death has a more emotional deeper impact on you.

My Dada Ji passed away when I was 10, Naani when I was 15, and Daadi when I was 28. When I compare these three deaths, the one that affected me emotionally more was when I was 28. Note, I was more emotionally attached to my Naani. And, I have no recollection of nasty experience when I was 10, even though I remember the events clearly.

Also, on a side note, I am more reminded about death the most when I am either going to bed, getting closer to bed or sometimes when I wake up in morning.

Death is a good reminder, and cleanser but this reminder happens on its own.

Some of the things are automatic, for me I woke up couple times in the middle of the night by hearing loud noises outside. I wake up and my heart is going crazy and I just rush outside to make sure everything is okay and find bro and dad arguing and talking so loudly since dad is drunk  and bro can't handle his madness. The emotions I go through are hard to express but will try. It's usually a fight or flight response where I rush outside to save both of them so they won't get into physical fight but when my pleading does not make them stop verbal argument then I start shaking like crazy and that shaking gets so hard I don't have enough stamina to stand.  I don't cry at that moment, it's just stupid shaking gets me so weak. I know usually fear of one of my family member getting hurts get so heavy that my body starts shutting down. Man it's crazy, luckily it has been calm since couple few months. Thank vaheguru. I have cried couple times too but it usually because I was like maybe one of them will see the tears and will control the drnk attitde or anger. I guess at that moment, when pleading does not work, I have used tear to make them stop bu oh well men and their ego are barely loosen up with tears :(

My mom freaks out over small stuff and her breathing gets so heavy and then she go around like saying haye rabba haye rabba. We all have different ways to cope with trauma but yea that fake crying is annoying. I onl saw it back in India here people stay calm.

when my dadiI ji passed away, I was 16 I think. I got the news around 4 am and I had no emotions. No pain at all.  Did not spend much time with her so maybe there was no bond and she did not care about me much either. Even though I used to g to her when she was diagnosed with cancer and used to take care of her but I did not do it cuz I wanted too. Dad forced me so needless to say there was no emotional attachment. She passed away and I did not cry, I went to funeral. It was not that much crying. No one did fake crying and even cousins were calm too. I stayed in funeral and was waiting for my tears to show up cuz I did not want people to think I did not care she went away. I was super emotionless that day. I was even the last one to give her the flower and have a last look and as soon as I went near her and tried to put flowers and saw her face that's when I got the shock that shes gone and she's dead. I burst into tears and had a loud cry and being a quiet person that surprised me. So I realized that some time in situations like this you can stay calm until it hits you hard. My bro cousin kept going to restroom to cry since he did not want anyone to see his tears, I wish he would have not care about that men should not cry .

also when she passed away, before dying she always talked about tractors, land back in Punjab. Now I know where her surti was, she did path on and off but was not that good with her heart area. I have way too much attachment with my dada ji, he's healthy and happy but I know one day he will have to go too and that sucks. Like I want him to live 20 more years so he can play with my future kids. But karmi apo apni so I won't think a lot abou this stuff but losing people sucks 

[Ragmaala]

haha attachment is a admin cut , what can you do lol

[GurpreetKaur]

10 minutes ago, Gunahgar said:

haha attachment is a admin cut , what can you do lol

What is admin cut?

[Ragmaala]

24 minutes ago, GurpreetKaur said:

I got the shock that shes gone and she's dead.

Yeah, that is the moment. When my Daadi passed away a year ago, I was fine for the first day. But when I called Chacha I could not talk to him, had a knot in throat, thats when I went to washroom and let it out.

I did a Sehaj Path for Daadi in 7 days. I was tearing up during path....and the messages of Guru Sahib felt so real...nothing mattered at that time , only God. But that avastha slowly went away...lol..back into world.   And the Hukumnama came was Gur Poore Charni Laya...awesome hukamnama .which meant my path was successful.

[GurpreetKaur]

11 hours ago, Gunahgar said:

Yeah, that is the moment. When my Daadi passed away a year ago, I was fine for the first day. But when I called Chacha I could not talk to him, had a knot in throat, thats when I went to washroom and let it out.

I did a Sehaj Path for Daadi in 7 days. I was tearing up during path....and the messages of Guru Sahib felt so real...nothing mattered at that time , only God. But that avastha slowly went away...lol..back into world.   And the Hukumnama came was Gur Poore Charni Laya...awesome hukamnama .which meant my path was successful.

Great job for doing sehaj path in 7 days. That's great.

[paapiman]

@dalsingh101@amardeep

Daas is almost certain that the moves done by women during matam, were invented by Mata Parbhati jee. Maybe, it has a different name in Sanskrit. Daas will try to provide audio reference, if found. Most likely, Indian women did Matam, before the introduction of Islam in India.

 

Bhul chuk maaf

[dalsingh101]

@samurai or anyone else in the know:

 

What creatine do you/would you take? 

[samurai]

6 hours ago, dalsingh101 said:

What creatine do you/would you take? 

I asked my cuz about this, hes pretty clued up on this stuff and does thorough research before taking any sups,  i trust him so ill just share what he said..

'best to take it before and after workout (1 scoop before and 1 scoop post), but only take the post scoop if your protein shake does not have creatine in it'

another thing he did say was that use it for only 4-6 weeks for bulk phase as it becomes ineffective after that.. that's from his experience..it costs £22 for powder and £35 for liquid..

[dalsingh101]

10 minutes ago, samurai said:

I asked my cuz about this, hes pretty clued up on this stuff and does thorough research before taking any sups,  i trust him so ill just share what he said..

'best to take it before and after workout (1 scoop before and 1 scoop post), but only take the post scoop if your protein shake does not have creatine in it'

another thing he did say was that use it for only 4-6 weeks for bulk phase as it becomes ineffective after that.. that's from his experience..it costs £22 for powder and £35 for liquid..

Cool, I was thinking of jumping on this, is reasonably priced and that? 

 

http://www.discount-supplements.co.uk/sports-supplements-creatine-optimum-health-creatine-monohydrate-500g#hidden_review

[samurai]

@dalsingh101..I've just text cousin if there are other products bit cheaper.. as i'm a bit skeptical when things are too cheap, just hold on a day or so..

[samurai]

@dalsingh101My skepticism just got chucked out window..lol..cuz sent link

http://www.myprotein.com/sports-nutrition/creatine-monohydrate/10530050.html

 

[dalsingh101]

Just now, samurai said:

@dalsingh101My skepticism just got chucked out window..lol

http://www.myprotein.com/sports-nutrition/creatine-monohydrate/10530050.html

 

Great find.

[samurai]

Make sure you check post and package, this is where they normally bond paat you

[dalsingh101]

3 minutes ago, samurai said:

Make sure you check post and package, this is where they normally bond paat you

I clocked that one! lol

You often get free shipping when you buy over a certain amount. So it can be a good idea to partner up with a few buddies and buy your shit together. 

[Ragmaala]

On 2016-03-01 at 7:54 PM, Gunahgar said:

todays workout ( 29/02/16)running 5 mins,

chest incline press 45lbs ( in each hand)  x 8 , 5; 35lbsx 8,6;       flat press  45 lbs x  9, 6; 35 lbsx 10, 10 , 10.  total 9 sets.   did 5 mins abs.

total time: 42 mins,

 

 

todays workout MArch 5, 2016.

running 5 mins,

chest incline press 45lbs ( in each hand)  x 9,6,5; 40lbsx 5;       flat press  45 lbs x 6, 6;6    40 lbsx 8,6 .  35lbsx10.

Abs:  100 ab cycles, 20 ab crunches/half-situps, 20 glute bridges, supermanpose held 20s, cobra pose stretching

total time: 52 mins,

Some slight improvements in workout compared to last one, new records were set. Blue means up, red means down. Slow & Steady.

Also update on rotis:  I stick to only one roti in a day. The crash or withdrawal feeling is gone I feel. Also, I feel that one roti makes me full as if I ate 2 rotis in old times. Mom is mad that why am I not eating enough rotis. I said Mummy ji please let me experiment and dont discuss diet with me lol.

 

[dalsingh101]

@Gunahgar

 

That's a good old workout there!!

 

Keep it up!!

 

Did legs myself today. Some squats, deadlifts and calve raises. 

[dalsingh101]

Quote

I wake up and my heart is going crazy and I just rush outside to make sure everything is okay and find bro and dad arguing and talking so loudly since dad is drunk  and bro can't handle his madness. The emotions I go through are hard to express but will try. It's usually a fight or flight response where I rush outside to save both of them so they won't get into physical fight but when my pleading does not make them stop verbal argument then I start shaking like crazy and that shaking gets so hard I don't have enough stamina to stand.  I don't cry at that moment, it's just stupid shaking gets me so weak. I know usually fear of one of my family member getting hurts get so heavy that my body starts shutting down. 

Don't get physically inbetween them if they kick off. You might get hurt accidentally. 

Also, watch out for crying too much to try and get them to stop if it obviously doesn't work. Once you do this too much, they will just become used to it as a background noise. Then when you are genuinely crying they wont even notice, like the boy who cried wolf. 

 

How old is your brother btw?  

 

[GurpreetKaur]

1 hour ago, dalsingh101 said:

Don't get physically inbetween them if they kick off. You might get hurt accidentally. 

Also, watch out for crying too much to try and get them to stop if it obviously doesn't work. Once you do this too much, they will just become used to it as a background noise. Then when you are genuinely crying they wont even notice, like the boy who cried wolf. 

 

How old is your brother btw?  

 

No it's no take crying. Anybody would cry when two members in the family are arguing to the point where a physical fights chances are so heavy. It's just I can hold my tears outside and can let them out when I come in my room and usually I have done it. But I let them out front of them few times thinking maybe it will make at least  one of them calm down. Usually want brother to calm down since he is strong and can do a lot of damage . but can't blame him either dad pushes all of his buttons.  tears never melted dad even though when bro and I were nikkey nikkey. when alcohol get inside him no matter good father he is he throw everything outta window. I think that alcohol freakin posses him. I don't know I hate sharab with passion. But I can't escape from it my cousins not only try to get me drinking, can't believe they offered my mom beer too many times and mom is like tut painey. Lol

Bros almost 29.  

And about tears I don't know if I try to manipulate but from my point of view if I am in pain and I cry front of someone that's just my way of showing hey listen I am too weak to handle this, help me of you love me lol. I don't know how is it in uk and canada but here if I or any of my girl cry front of their bro and dad, we think they will think we have a guy issue so crying is a big no no. Men don't cry since they don't wanna look bad, we girls suck up our tears cuz don't want Fam to get wrong signal. Being an Indian girl with a closed minded family sucks big time.

[Ragmaala]

19 minutes ago, GurpreetKaur said:

I don't know I hate sharab with passion

No wonder a lot of girls these days are looking for non-drinking guys even though their family members drink.

You and your mom can only pray for your Dad...or if you ever find a powerful real Sant take him there. Meantime, keep praying.

[samurai]

12 hours ago, Gunahgar said:

I stick to only one roti in a day. The crash or withdrawal feeling is gone I feel. Also, I feel that one roti makes me full as if I ate 2 rotis in old times

make sure you dont take a step back, you may get a binge feeling for roti, at that point say NO (tyar bar tyar..lol)..but keep at it,  your training looks god too..

9 hours ago, Gunahgar said:

you ever find a powerful real Sant take him there

I dont know why but when i read this, two stories popped in my head.

1) There was a sevak who wanted to do langar seva at sant baba ishar singhs dera, baba ji said not yet a few times untill eventually sevaks request was granted. So babji told sevak these are your duties now get on with it. The sevak after a few days started walking away from the langar hall and baba ji approached him on his way out and asked 'where are you going',

sevak replied 'i cannot do this seva, its too much',

babji was like 'you was soo persistent before, whats happened?

Sevak, 'since i started the langar seva my kaam is becoming uncontrollable, im constantly having kaami thoughts, it was not like this before, i was happier before this seva'

baba ji, 'do parkarma round me 4 four times'

Sevak did so and instatly his kaamic thoughts went and carried on his seva as normal.. 

Goes to show the power of sant/mahapursh. Some may not believe init but each to their own, my experiances lead me to believe these things are very much possible, if a powerfull force like kaam can be overcome, shraab is nothing..

2) a distant family member would drink soo much and do his own and familys besti everytime there was a wedding or some function (slurring dancing like a prat etc).. After a few years i met him and was shocked that he quit drinking, he was like i stopped drinking for about 2 years or so. So i was intrigued, so asked him why,, he goes after one wedding my daughter the following morning sat me down and told me how i embarrass her every time i get drunk,. She goes she is embarssed to call me her dad and does not want to be near me wheni drink (at the time girl was only 14/15 whenshe sat him down)...he goes this sent 'shockwaves' down me now everytime people try forcing me to drink i just think of what my daughter said and its not worth it...(fair play)

I think these two popped up in my head as i feel one need to look at their situation uniquely and act accordingly, it may be just some practical methods,ie talking,make a rule of no alcohol in house etc.. or doin path solely/collectively/doing akhand path/goin mahapursh.. what ever works.

 

[samurai]

8 hours ago, Gunahgar said:

No wonder a lot of girls these days are looking for non-drinking guys even though their family members drink

Also bro, men are looking for girls who do not drink aswell.. In uk (and i know its same in canada) women are drinking on same level as men, back in the day girls would drink on the sly as they had a bit of sharm but now they drink 'khulla dhulla'. a recent wedding i went to girls were getting smashed and one girl was legless, literally had to be carried by her cousins/mates, besti or wot.