Chandi di vaar in nitnem

[vahegurujio]

I used to do this baani everyday around the afternoon just listening to it. I have a mad respect for mataji as she Darshan of Guru Hargobind Sahibji and her saki is amazing. 

 

During listening to this baani, I felt a mad urge to cut off a goats head and drink the blood and eat the beating heart. 

 

Since then I went to the mahaan at the gurdwara and they told me to take all dasam grants out my nitnem. This included CDV, shastaar naam mala and brahm kavich. The only baani from dasam granth involved in my nitnem now is just the 3 in panj baaniya. I listen to other baani too. Sukhmani sahib was one. I was also told to stop listening to salok mahalla nauva and for those bani that I was told to drop, I replaced with dukh panjani sahib and shabad hazare.

 

Since doing this I feel a really nice peace but I miss dasam granth paatsha baani so much. I miss having the bir ras inside me. I too am also in 2 minds as do I go back to listening to my old nitnem? When I listen to the odd baani here and there I feel a sense of guilt like I'm going against the mahaan of the guru ghar but I don't think he understands my POV. 

 

At heart I'm a nihang singh but I took amrit else where which don't belive in the way of dal. I feel unsure what to do at this point. If I carry on, am I living my life to please others? My only itcha is to have Darshan of maharaj and I feel that the maryada at budda dal will help get me there. I also find it so hard to keep weight off as a veggie. I struggle with my diet. Alot of things. 

 

I don't mean to cause any offence to any samprota just expressing my views and feelings and any advice will be greatly appreciated.

 

Bhul chuk maaf saadh sangatji

 

[Soulfinder]

Dass himself reads Chandi di vaar alongside with Chandi Chirtars 1,2 and shastar naam mala. What i can advise is that read Sukhmani Sahib ji asap after you have listened or read any dasam banis. As this didn't happen with dass with what you have described.

[paapiman]

On 5/3/2023 at 8:26 PM, vahegurujio said:

I used to do this baani everyday around the afternoon just listening to it. I have a mad respect for mataji as she Darshan of Guru Hargobind Sahibji and her saki is amazing. 

 

During listening to this baani, I felt a mad urge to cut off a goats head and drink the blood and eat the beating heart. 

 

Since then I went to the mahaan at the gurdwara and they told me to take all dasam grants out my nitnem. This included CDV, shastaar naam mala and brahm kavich. The only baani from dasam granth involved in my nitnem now is just the 3 in panj baaniya. I listen to other baani too. Sukhmani sahib was one. I was also told to stop listening to salok mahalla nauva and for those bani that I was told to drop, I replaced with dukh panjani sahib and shabad hazare.

 

Since doing this I feel a really nice peace but I miss dasam granth paatsha baani so much. I miss having the bir ras inside me. I too am also in 2 minds as do I go back to listening to my old nitnem? When I listen to the odd baani here and there I feel a sense of guilt like I'm going against the mahaan of the guru ghar but I don't think he understands my POV. 

 

At heart I'm a nihang singh but I took amrit else where which don't belive in the way of dal. I feel unsure what to do at this point. If I carry on, am I living my life to please others? My only itcha is to have Darshan of maharaj and I feel that the maryada at budda dal will help get me there. I also find it so hard to keep weight off as a veggie. I struggle with my diet. Alot of things. 

 

I don't mean to cause any offence to any samprota just expressing my views and feelings and any advice will be greatly appreciated.

 

Bhul chuk maaf saadh sangatji

 

How much Jaap of Sri Dasam Gurbanis you used to do?

 

Bhul chuk maaf

[GurjantGnostic]

On 5/3/2023 at 5:26 PM, vahegurujio said:

I used to do this baani everyday around the afternoon just listening to it. I have a mad respect for mataji as she Darshan of Guru Hargobind Sahibji and her saki is amazing. 

 

During listening to this baani, I felt a mad urge to cut off a goats head and drink the blood and eat the beating heart. 

 

Since then I went to the mahaan at the gurdwara and they told me to take all dasam grants out my nitnem. This included CDV, shastaar naam mala and brahm kavich. The only baani from dasam granth involved in my nitnem now is just the 3 in panj baaniya. I listen to other baani too. Sukhmani sahib was one. I was also told to stop listening to salok mahalla nauva and for those bani that I was told to drop, I replaced with dukh panjani sahib and shabad hazare.

 

Since doing this I feel a really nice peace but I miss dasam granth paatsha baani so much. I miss having the bir ras inside me. I too am also in 2 minds as do I go back to listening to my old nitnem? When I listen to the odd baani here and there I feel a sense of guilt like I'm going against the mahaan of the guru ghar but I don't think he understands my POV. 

 

At heart I'm a nihang singh but I took amrit else where which don't belive in the way of dal. I feel unsure what to do at this point. If I carry on, am I living my life to please others? My only itcha is to have Darshan of maharaj and I feel that the maryada at budda dal will help get me there. I also find it so hard to keep weight off as a veggie. I struggle with my diet. Alot of things. 

 

I don't mean to cause any offence to any samprota just expressing my views and feelings and any advice will be greatly appreciated.

 

Bhul chuk maaf saadh sangatji

 

There's only one Amrit and you may have uncovered your own blood lust. 

[vahegurujio]

On 5/7/2023 at 6:26 AM, GurjantGnostic said:

There's only one Amrit and you may have uncovered your own blood lust. 

Building chuk maaf but why do we have different maryadas and rehit if its all the same? I thought that too until I done something outside maryada of sanprota and the told to retake my amrit however it was inline with sgpc rules

[vahegurujio]

On 5/5/2023 at 1:34 AM, paapiman said:

How much Jaap of Sri Dasam Gurbanis you used to do?

 

Bhul chuk maaf

Cdv, shastar naam mala, 3 in 5 baaniya nitnem, braham kavich also followed by sukhmani sahib, salok mahalla nauvan also and been doing it since December 2022

[vahegurujio]

On 5/5/2023 at 12:02 AM, Soulfinder said:

Dass himself reads Chandi di vaar alongside with Chandi Chirtars 1,2 and shastar naam mala. What i can advise is that read Sukhmani Sahib ji asap after you have listened or read any dasam banis. As this didn't happen with dass with what you have described.

Never read however always listened to the baanis

[GurjantGnostic]

17 minutes ago, vahegurujio said:

Building chuk maaf but why do we have different maryadas and rehit if its all the same? I thought that too until I done something outside maryada of sanprota and the told to retake my amrit however it was inline with sgpc rules

You could receive Amrit on the moon from Naam without a samparada. 

The Kurehit are universal. Perhaps your group has innovated aka added their manmukh to it. 

How did they say you broke Amrit?

[Soulfinder]

33 minutes ago, vahegurujio said:

Never read however always listened to the baanis

Listening is good however it also depends on what your mind thoughts are as well. Do you notice them changing when reading or listening to any dasam bani. Have you thought about seeing a dr psychiatrist about this as i am not trying to offend you but i suffer from depression and sometimes people can get high bir ras from these banis. I used to get excited as well in the early days but Sukhmani Sahib keeps me under control with the bir ras

 

[vahegurujio]

7 hours ago, GurjantGnostic said:

You could receive Amrit on the moon from Naam without a samparada. 

The Kurehit are universal. Perhaps your group has innovated aka added their manmukh to it. 

How did they say you broke Amrit?

By taking degh which was prepared with gurmat in my eyes as the singh had done ardas etc too

[vahegurujio]

7 hours ago, Soulfinder said:

Listening is good however it also depends on what your mind thoughts are as well. Do you notice them changing when reading or listening to any dasam bani. Have you thought about seeing a dr psychiatrist about this as i am not trying to offend you but i suffer from depression and sometimes people can get high bir ras from these banis. I used to get excited as well in the early days but Sukhmani Sahib keeps me under control with the bir ras

 

100% bro this is why I rely on it. If I'm being honest I don't feel depressed or anything like that at all. I get upset when I do things which I don't belive in. Gursikh pyaare, I come from a place of love when saying this but I don't agree with orthodox sikhi. I.e vegetarianism and staying away from degh etc. Like if its something a person wants to do cool do your thing but if a singh doesn't connect with that way he shouldn't feel or made to feel like he's wrong either. Bhul chuk maaf bhai sahib. Came here to discuss things with my brothers and apologise if I'm being too open about situations

[GurjantGnostic]

1 hour ago, vahegurujio said:

By taking degh which was prepared with gurmat in my eyes as the singh had done ardas etc too

Yeah. That's ignorant. And not acceptable. And not going to be tolerated. 

[GurjantGnostic]

1 hour ago, vahegurujio said:

100% bro this is why I rely on it. If I'm being honest I don't feel depressed or anything like that at all. I get upset when I do things which I don't belive in. Gursikh pyaare, I come from a place of love when saying this but I don't agree with orthodox sikhi. I.e vegetarianism and staying away from degh etc. Like if its something a person wants to do cool do your thing but if a singh doesn't connect with that way he shouldn't feel or made to feel like he's wrong either. Bhul chuk maaf bhai sahib. Came here to discuss things with my brothers and apologise if I'm being too open about situations ">

The people that try and enforce their meat or degh beliefs on others are low key apostate tyrant cultists. 

[vahegurujio]

1 hour ago, GurjantGnostic said:

The people that try and enforce their meat or degh beliefs on others are low key apostate tyrant cultists. 

I don't agree brother as it was something I wanted to do. I don't see anything wrong with it either 

[GurjantGnostic]

3 hours ago, vahegurujio said:

I don't agree brother as it was something I wanted to do. I don't see anything wrong with it either 

I mean force you to follow rules they made up not in Gurbani. 

[GurjantGnostic]

12 hours ago, vahegurujio said:

I don't agree brother as it was something I wanted to do. I don't see anything wrong with it either 

I've been studying narcicissm, mind control, hypnotism and cults. 

We score extremely well. Gurmat itself is THE anti cult. 

We are however human and also not immune to corruption. We have cults, and cult ideology in Sikhi. Just far less than other groups. 

Nothing Gurmat and a few big mouths can't fix. 

[dalsingh101]

17 hours ago, vahegurujio said:

. I.e vegetarianism and staying away from degh etc.

What you mean, staying away from degh? I understand the point about vegetarianism, historical evidence points to varying practices on this but a strict line on halaal seems to have been drawn.  So there seems to have been Singhs who were vege and others not from the get go. Both have valid points. Plus we know from what Baba Nanak ji said about fools arguing over meat eating.  

 

Quote

During listening to this baani, I felt a mad urge to cut off a goats head and drink the blood and eat the beating heart. 

I can understand someone wanting to do jhatka, so they would know how when required.  But this additional drinking blood thing, and eating a beating heart seems properly mental. 

[GurjantGnostic]

3 hours ago, dalsingh101 said:

What you mean, staying away from degh? I understand the point about vegetarianism, historical evidence points to varying practices on this but a strict line on halaal seems to have been drawn.  So there seems to have been Singhs who were vege and others not from the get go. Both have valid points. Plus we know from what Baba Nanak ji said about fools arguing over meat eating.  

 

I can understand someone wanting to do jhatka, so they would know how when required.  But this additional drinking blood thing, and eating a beating heart seems properly mental. 

When you join a gang, all the other gangs target you. Perhaps he was being attacked. Definitely an energy we wanna let go through Simran.