Khalsa'z_Pyari Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 Me in general, i'm not really a "typical" UK girl; like i'm really simple; you could say im a bit of a tom-boy; like you would never ever see me with make - up or wearing clothes where the body becomes naked. I mean my WHOLE life i've never changed my hairstyle or the way i look; but being in a society where you dont see many people in the UK who are really simple comes with problems. Like when i used to be in school i would get friends ask me 'why dont you wear make-up'? 'why dont you change your hair style?' or 'why dont you cut your hair shorter' I usually just ignored them; and thought ok it'll pass, but after telling them like my Religion doesnt allow cutting of the hair, they sort of quit asking me questions like this. In my opinion the most worse problem i faced because of these friends was that they would always say 'you got to make your self look pretty otherwise you won't get a boyfriend' i was really p'd off at this because the friend that said this to me was a apane; and i told her i dont go to school to look for a boy friend, i mean its clear that any child would go to school to get an education right? To top it off this friend was a bit of a coconut; and she told all my other white friends about how 'i've never been out with a boy' obviously it did hit me hard becuase you get white girls that WILL think there's something wrong with a girl if she doesnt ever have a boy friend? wat i dont understand why is this such a big deal? Is it wrong of me to see boy's as brother's or just general friends? At that point i did used to think there was something wrong with me like you know whether i'm a Sikh or not i AM A GIRL, and yep it did cross my mind like 'am i really that ugly, that not even one boy would ask me out?' Of course i would never ask or tell my mum this otherwise i would get a telling off etc. But even a year on from school; i still ask my mum do you think im ugly? or do you think im fat? i dont know why i've got it in my head to please people that i couldn't care less about, but me being at the age that i am, arent i bound to be self-concious? Sorry with this being so long, but my question, is is there something wrong with me for not doing or looking like what a typical girl would do or look like? is it wrong of me not to wear or dress up as what a general girl in today's society wears and dresses? and is it normal for a 16 year old girl to be so self-concious? Please help? :? and thank you 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khalsa'z_Pyari Posted May 31, 2006 Author Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 anybody? please help a young Bhenji? :cry: 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artistformalyknownasodhi Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 follow ur dil...and stay niara...once start acting like everyone else there is no difference....mearly another face in the crowd...plus think of were u wanna be in a couple of years...college/uni etc...and then think wa is sikhi to u...relax enjoy mahraajs creation. oh n on the self concious bit, well i got a 17yr old younger sis....n yup its nothing different.... but like i said...keep ur self niara...nothing becomes of those who are mearly a statistic. akaaaaaaal 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pheena Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 follow ur dil...and stay niara...once start acting like everyone else there is no difference....mearly another face in the crowd...plus think of were u wanna be in a couple of years...college/uni etc...and then think wa is sikhi to u...relax enjoy mahraajs creation. oh n on the self concious bit, well i got a 17yr old younger sis....n yup its nothing different.... but like i said...keep ur self niara...nothing becomes of those who are mearly a statistic. akaaaaaaal solid advice. Society expects you to conform to its standards. The mind is very influential especially from our peers. Those that fall into the trap often get lost and become just another face like the veer above said. Either you conform to its standards or you stand within society and create your own standards. It is YOUR life, not theirs. Live your life according to how you wish to live it, not by how Society wants you to become. People will judge you, they will speak ill of you, they will make fun of you. God too has given then a tounge and a mind so they are free to speak, think what they wish. It is how you react to their speech that matter. The only control you have is of your actions, take them with awareness and everything else will fall into place. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artistformalyknownasodhi Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 lol some one agree's wid me *plans of world domination are now in effect* 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xylitol Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 The Guru has written that the Khalsa has either conquered, or is always in a state of rebelliion. We do not mindlessly conform to the ignorent ideals of a society that wants us to fit in just b/c they fear difference. It's fantastic that you stuck to your principles. Your are normal, you just think a little bit more. That kind of self-consciousness is normal for a girl your age. However, I recommend that you stay away from girly mags and messed up people who will reinforce the idea that you shoudl follow these foolish stereotypes. That will help deal with the self consciousness. Also, do Paath and simran, first thing in the morning. I would ask the Guru for Chardi kala (high spirits). Please post if you want more advice. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artistformalyknownasodhi Posted June 1, 2006 Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 Solid advise....great stuff... But u shouldnt leave ur mates because they are ignorant of different cultures and religeons...be who u are...tru friends come to u any ways... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khalsa'z_Pyari Posted June 1, 2006 Author Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 thank you for replies; helped big time. ppl in this forum r really clever and give great advise. thank you soo much. Xylitol, i would love 2 hear more thank you. Solid advise....great stuff... But u shouldnt leave ur mates because they are ignorant of different cultures and religeons...be who u are...tru friends come to u any ways... well, i sort of wanted to leave these "mates" becuase i know what i had to deal with everyday. i havent stopped speaking to them becuase of their Religion etc i dont speak to them becuase of their bad intentions. but i suppose your right about the tru firneds coming our way. End of the day im not really bothered whether i have such friends, as long as i got Waheguru, my mum and two brothers im sure i'll survive :wink: 8) 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artistformalyknownasodhi Posted June 1, 2006 Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 thank you for replies; helped big time. ppl in this forum r really clever and give great advise. thank you soo much. Xylitol, i would love 2 hear more thank you. well, i sort of wanted to leave these "mates" becuase i know what i had to deal with everyday. i havent stopped speaking to them becuase of their Religion etc i dont speak to them becuase of their bad intentions. but i suppose your right about the tru firneds coming our way. End of the day im not really bothered whether i have such friends, as long as i got Waheguru, my mum and two brothers im sure i'll survive :wink: 8) worry not sikhi is full of brothers and sisters 8) me loving it wid da smart arse remarks 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khalsa'z_Pyari Posted June 1, 2006 Author Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 lol... yep im glad im a SIKH 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artistformalyknownasodhi Posted June 1, 2006 Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 so like am at work.....argh i'm sooooo bored *polly wanna cracker* 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khalsa'z_Pyari Posted June 1, 2006 Author Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 so like am at work.....argh i'm sooooo bored *polly wanna cracker* lol 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xylitol Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 Bad sangat is that which leads you away from the Guru. If these people make you uncomfortable about your religion, then it may be best for you to distance yourself from them. I did that with many of my friends, some i just cut off relations with totally (wanted to cut me off from sikhi); and others i slowly distanced myself from (b/c it was harder to be devoted to sikhi after hanging around them, although they are still good people who do respect my religious choice, their path is just going in a different direction then mine). Sounds like you're at the point in life of 2 roads diverging in wood, sounds like you're taking the path less trodden and consequently moving away from your friends, trust me - n the end it makes all the difference i!! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artistformalyknownasodhi Posted June 3, 2006 Report Share Posted June 3, 2006 lol...i got 101 different mates some dnt have a clue about sikhi...some due every intoxicant under the sun on a regular occasion...in all there acts i have never once thought about doing something i didnt want to do, its about being self confident in ur thoughts and ur actions. mahakaaal 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khalsa'z_Pyari Posted June 3, 2006 Author Report Share Posted June 3, 2006 Bad sangat is that which leads you away from the Guru. If these people make you uncomfortable about your religion, then it may be best for you to distance yourself from them. I did that with many of my friends, some i just cut off relations with totally (wanted to cut me off from sikhi); and others i slowly distanced myself from (b/c it was harder to be devoted to sikhi after hanging around them, although they are still good people who do respect my religious choice, their path is just going in a different direction then mine). Sounds like you're at the point in life of 2 roads diverging in wood, sounds like you're taking the path less trodden and consequently moving away from your friends, trust me - n the end it makes all the difference i!! well, im not stuck on choosing between friends or Relgion, obviously Religion come's first b/c i think thats wats going to be there for me every time something happens to go good or bad; whereas friends, they just come and go. im not 2 bothered about friends anymore. :wink: 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dynamic_Banda Posted June 3, 2006 Report Share Posted June 3, 2006 The greatest friend for me is the one who I ignored everytime he called to me, and was there everytime I called to him.. This world is full of change, the only thing that you have to present here is your self.. by being yourself.. what else can you give to the world.. as nothing is ours to give all we have is this and even this isnt ours.. By his grace being you is the best you can ever offer. Just pray that everyday it is in his charan that you remain, wether your aware of it or not.. after all I am nothing more then a fool.. and a fool is all I am Lol I chat so much crap... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khalsa'z_Pyari Posted June 3, 2006 Author Report Share Posted June 3, 2006 The greatest friend for me is the one who I ignored everytime he called to me, and was there everytime I called to him.. This world is full of change, the only thing that you have to present here is your self.. by being yourself.. what else can you give to the world.. as nothing is ours to give all we have is this and even this isnt ours.. By his grace being you is the best you can ever offer. Just pray that everyday it is in his charan that you remain, wether your aware of it or not.. after all I am nothing more then a fool.. and a fool is all I am Lol I chat so much crap... i understand what ur sayin up ther ^^^ thank you; ur very knowledgeable. guess wat im a BIGGER fool, im the MOTHER of ALL fools.... BEAT THAT.... 8) 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unbreakable Posted June 7, 2006 Report Share Posted June 7, 2006 .. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khalsa'z_Pyari Posted June 8, 2006 Author Report Share Posted June 8, 2006 Nothing wrong with you. Be a shepard and not a sheep. You are born to Lead not to follow. awww beutiful words of wisdom; u kno wat ther shuld b a seperate thread 4 words of wisdom; i mean liek no copyright stuff from our Guru; but liek our own sort of thing.. :wink: 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unbreakable Posted June 9, 2006 Report Share Posted June 9, 2006 .. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khalsa'z_Pyari Posted June 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted June 9, 2006 I should copyright that. haha. Thanks. but its true. I predict that very soon, in the near future there shall be a explosion of Sikhi around the globe, a shockwave, when the world realises that only Guru can save them. :!: :!: :!: 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pheena Posted June 9, 2006 Report Share Posted June 9, 2006 I predict that very soon, in the near future there shall be a explosion of Sikhi around the globe, a shockwave, when the world realises that only Guru can save them. Christians have already covered that base with Jesus. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khalsa'z_Pyari Posted June 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted June 9, 2006 notice how he says SIKHI not Christians or Jesus... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artistformalyknownasodhi Posted June 9, 2006 Report Share Posted June 9, 2006 lol pyari didnt u get it...well never mind. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
akaali Posted June 10, 2006 Report Share Posted June 10, 2006 I predict that very soon, in the near future there shall be a explosion of Sikhi around the globe, a shockwave, when the world realises that only Guru can save them. so its gotta be true! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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