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LOVE


wahegurubol
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Hello, there was a girl I still love , everything was going fine in between us, we both are amritdharis, but now for some reason the relation ship will break forever and wont materialise into marriage. I had promised to SGGS that I will marry her not anyone else and I accepted her as my wife.

But I think at that time I was completely and wholly wrong to make such a promise and I think this relationship may not work as the girl is backing out.

What you think I should, should I remain bachelor now?

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Ask your parents to find you a respectful Gursikh girl.

I never quite understood this notion of making promises, taking oaths etc... it seems to me if a man says he is going to do something, then he should keep his word and do it, God sees all, but obviously you can only do that which is in your power.

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Yes I'm sorry it seems you will have to remain a bachelor for the rest of your life as you have promised it. And if she promised with you too then she also has to remain celibate for the rest of her life. This is quite serious. I wish u both well and remain celibates forever this life. Its the best thing to do for u at this point since ur already 26.

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Well if you break your promis that means you are making fun with Waheguru, it's like breaking your amrit. So fatehsingh is right you have to remain brahmchari all your life now.

but that promise was my MISTAKE.. my nadani,and God showed me .... that he doesnt accept my sanjog with that girl! .... by making that promise i tried to take hukam in my own hands and God proved it to me that I cant do it.

moreover... we are not married until anandkaraj, and perhaps how we know, maybe God never accepted my promise... He can forgive me as a nadaan bacha.

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but there are some sikh guys who told me that its okay and that Maharaaj ji forgives. ... afterall it is in the hands of Maharaaj with whom we marry and whom we dont... who are we infront of Maharaaji ji, not even a small ant, He controls everything. .. and if we make mistakes and promises in mistakes.

I was also told... "Bekhari se raaja...raaja se bikhari"... first of all such a promise was never valid in the first hand... if it was then bikhari se raja aur raja se bikhari wali gul nahi hundi c.

Chalia muktia also made promise they wrote their names on the paper that they donn belongto the Guru, but then the Guru tore that paper, if u know the story.

anyways.. i need advice from sangat, what the sangat says that I will do it.. if everyone says dont marry.. I wont marry.

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Just go freaking apologise for being a fool (to Mahraj) and explain you probably won't be able to keep it.

It was a stupid promise and Mahraj is not a dogmatic a**hole, they'll understand. Seems more to me like you went and promised, and Mahraj's reaction was 'pisht, like hell you will'...or something to that effect.

Why people act like Guru Sahib is a sadistic little b*tch that waits for any opportunity to punish you I'll never understand...it's like you all went to Catholic school

honestly get over it and quit whining, we don't exist to get married, there are other fish in the sea etc etc

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thanks a lot vinegar. i use to pray day and night to maharaaj for that girl. i use to do simran all night long without sleeping for that girl, i did it for 3 months and maharaaj gave me her love and i was so in love with that girl that i had promised maharaaj that i wont marry anyone else...

but you know every 2 weeks everything between me and the girl would go fine and then after 2 weeks everything would go bad and then good and then bad..it kept happening like this.

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thanks a lot vinegar. i use to pray day and night to maharaaj for that girl. i use to do simran all night long without sleeping for that girl, i did it for 3 months and maharaaj gave me her love and i was so in love with that girl that i had promised maharaaj that i wont marry anyone else...

that's fallacy

you did simran *of* that girl, not *for* that girl.

simran is constant remembrance of Mahraaj, if you're thinking of the girl all night and asking God for her (let's ignore that we 're talkinga bout her like she's a bicycle or something) then you are not doing Simran, and at best your 'Simran' is jhoota 'cuz you did it for fal

you want advice from a SIkh perspective?

riK riK pYr Dry pau Drxw ]

rakh rakh pair dhharae po dhharanaa ||

Carefully, carefully, I place my feet upon the ground.

jq kq dyKau qyrI srxw ]

jath kath dhaekho thaeree saranaa ||

Wherever I go, I behold Your Sanctuary.

duKu suKu dyih qUhY min Bwvih quJ hI isau bix AweI hy ]15]

dhukh sukh dhaehi thoohai man bhaavehi thujh hee sio ban aaee hae ||15||

Whether You grant me pain or pleasure, You are pleasing to my mind. I am in harmony with You. ||15||

Panna 1022, don't remember how to show the Gurmukhi

naturally, you won't accept it seeing as it's not telling you what you want to hear

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