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have u found a girl that accepts u for u?


jatta
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sat sri akaaaaaaaaaal to all the brother and sisters on this site!

Would like to thank all as this site and everyone on it played a role in my decision to become amritdhaari. Have done alot of learning from this site about sikhi, gurbani, etc and my love for it grows each day.

However, i feel like my personal/love life has suffered. My relationship of three years ended some time ago becuase of my "new" look. - growing my hair, and wearing a turban. Apparantly i wasnt good looking enough as i was before and she couldnt/didnt want to be seen with me. And since then i find that the opposite sex is less interested in me becuase of my looks, whereas before i had, literally, girls throwing themselves at me (that was when i was clean shaven).

Its a bit depressing, but i know there will be a time when a girl will accept me for me. Just wanted to hear some stories of amritdhaaris who have found that true love. Give myself hope in the mean time, its just a bit sad, thats all that people base love on looks.

looking forward to all the responses, thanks in advance!

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Do you have that true love Sukh Singh??If not, don't say as you have above.Unless you have experinced that Ishq Haqiqi.Have you experience of that Ishq of Guru Sahib?

What about the Amritdhari who sees his wife as Guru Mata and his wife sees him as Guru Dev?That is Ishq Haqiqi.

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a real amritdharis true love is only between guru sahib and himself.

How you expect to love guroo ji when you don't love his creations??

Remember true love does exist between two souls even in a secondary form...primary love should be love for guroo maharaj ji...Guru maharaj himself were gristhi...and now dont tell me Guru Maharaj didnt love his wife/wives.

Jatta veer ji,

The relationship from girl side was just an attraction of an phsyical body...she never loved your soul...she never could understand the true love which is inside...she is just another girl who is illusioned with phsyical attraction and called it love!...

To be honest, she is not worth crying for or get depressed for because she loved you from outside not inside...so it wasn't a true love anyway...

I would say get over it veer ji...move forward... life is much more than crying for a girl who wasnt even worth it....

True relationship, true soul mates comes with guroo's kirpa....so focus on love in sikhi .. guroo maharaj apaie kirpa kar danen gaie.... :D :D

I ll leave you with few words of wisdom!

Self Percept(Atam Updesh)

Why are you so engrossed in worries? Why are you afraid of some one? Who may kill you? The soul is immortal; it neither dies nor takes birth.

The present is here and now, the past is irrecoverable and the future will be good. Don't fret over the past and don't be worried about the future. The present is going on.

Why do you cry? What did you lose? When you were born, what did you bring along, which has been lost? What did you produce which has been perished? It is here that you gained and it is here that you lose. The man comes to; and goes from world, empty handed.

What you own today was not yours yesterday and will not be yours tomorrow. It does not and will not belong to anyone. You consider it your own and rejoice. This happiness of possession leads you to utter grief.

Yours is this world. Start from where you feel to; stay where you desire and wind up where you want to. It has no beginning and no end. You don't fear anyone, but yourself. You are the fright and also the frightened.

Change is the truth of life. What you consider as death is life in reality. In a moment a multi-millionaire is turned pauper. Give up the feeling of possession, great & the mean; differentiation of friend & foe. Then all is yours and you for everyone. Your corporeal being is a product of air, water, fire ,sky and earth and it merges into the same leaving behind neither blood nor bones. Still yours existence remains the same. Then ponder over what you are.

Wake up! and become the eternal sons of the Almighty. You are the great and unique manifestation of Nature's power. All the divine powers are possessed by you, like a tree hidden in the seed.

In fact you don't fear anybody; you don't have any worry, suspicion, pain or grief. You are His dear ones. Surrender yourself completely to Him.

Always, remember the "Waheguru" (God) to achieve salvation. Let your life be guided by the saying "Whatever God wills, is good". Be content with the will of God. Remember Him both in pleasure & pain.

Compiled by his Holiness: Sant baba isher singh ji rara sahib.

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My relationship of three years ended some time ago becuase of my "new" look. - growing my hair, and wearing a turban. Apparantly i wasnt good looking enough as i was before and she couldnt/didnt want to be seen with me.
Consider yourself lucky that it happened immediately. You don't want someone to be with you as a compulsion.

And since then i find that the opposite sex is less interested in me becuase of my looks, whereas before i had, literally, girls throwing themselves at me (that was when i was clean shaven).
Its the opposite in my case (according to me and some friends while others still disagree) except for the "throwing at me part" :P:LOL:
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sukhsingh,

exact same boat as you bro!

I was with a girl for 2.5 years, and I know exactly what you mean about the girls situation, but I'll share whats happened with me.

Things weren't all that hot in my previous situation, she and I had differences, actually it was more of my reluctance to conform to her sect/group made me a pariah.

Well, she bailed out on me, and Its the best thing she could have done, because that has allowed me to meet the person who I am going to spend the rest of my life with.... I wouldn't have been able to hook up with thiis girl when I was not amritdhari (and she isn't amritdhari yet) because she would have thought I was a player.

pm me, we'll chat.....

waheguru ji ka khalsa, waheguru ji ki fateh

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lol everyone has been on the end of some kinda heart break. If u really want to be with the right person i wud say jus wait....

If u trust guruji...u will wait until u are ready to get married...wen u can provide for this girl...and for the family u are gna have...

Who is better at chosing, u or god??

Jo mangai apney te soyee soyee devai...rite..jus ask for god to do his kirpa...do ardaas...ask guruji, i want someone who gna gna bring me even closer 2 u, not someone who will take me away from u.

wen the time comes and u are prepared to be give someone a gud husband...a stable home...a comfortable life...then start lookin for a girl....yeah rishtaa even and with kirpa, if u believe....u will get the rite partner for u.

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sukhsingh,

exact same boat as you bro!

I was with a girl for 2.5 years, and I know exactly what you mean about the girls situation, but I'll share whats happened with me.

pm me, we'll chat.....

waheguru ji ka khalsa, waheguru ji ki fateh

wtf u tlaking about bro. it wasnt me who posted this post, it was jatta.

im not in the same boat as u guy... :?

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excellent reply hari. Stop saying things unless you've experienced them first hand..

love the guru blah blah. true love!

that only makes it cliche and meaningless. comeon guys, be more genuine!

nah i cant find a girl who'll accept me. infact it has nothing to do with me being a singh. its probably got to do with me being too good for most girls. it gets lonely sometimes but so what, that makes life interesting.

but then again, there was one time i liked a girl and would have been happy to marry her. we were quite close and then i realised she didnt want to marry a singh.(i speak in terms of marriage because to me the only romantic relationships worth persuing are those that can quite possibly lead to marriage - we were too young yet to get married!) she was superficially speaking a good sikh girl. the rejection hurt.

so i got angry and swore at some money for a while.and that was a good way of dealing with it, but now im not like that all. i think singhs who blame moneh, or singhs who blame girls that like moneh are being a bit lame.

just gotta realsie there more to life that a girl. we are conditioned these days to believe that without a partner you are nothing. and there is a biological reason for that too, so its just not modern day living. but i think if you fight it hard you can come out winning.

just stop caring about that stuff. i know its hard, but try it anyway. i learned the hard way. if you are proud of being a singh, be happy with what you got. if you arent, then go get a haircut and get the life you want. its your choice. its hard cuz your mates will cuss you for selling out .. and you'll have lost something you probably you maintained through a lot of pain. but its important to be content.

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sodhi, it's supposed to affect ur body more than ur brain. but i'm thinkin that it's quite possible ur taking some other *ahem* medicines... not necessarily performance enhancing drugs... or chocolate... lol... :P

i have one thing to say bout this topic...

the more u focus on looking for the right person, the longer u'll have to wait. just live your life. if someone happens to walk into ur life and it works out, it works out. but if you actively seek someone out, you'll probably find that you don't find anyone.

be happy. work. go and make some friends. get caught up on ur reading. develop some healthy hobbies. and the next thing u know... BOOM... u've got urself someone that loves you as much as you love them. capeche? good.

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